Return to Normalcy
by sciencegeeky
Summary: Cabrières, France, 1947. France is in shambles directly following World War II, and in a small town in the south, sixteen teenagers carry their own stories. But for now, all they want is the return to normalcy.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: In Which We Find Out It's Not Modern Day USA

Aradia loved the small town of Cabrières where she lived. It was beautiful and unique, with its rolling hills and flowering trees. The flowers that decorated the town, especially the hotel Feferi's mother ran, were among the loveliest things she'd ever seen. She felt more alive, more colored, more excited about the infinite possibilities life could offer. Everything seemed to have color. She sat by the edge of the small lake and laughed aloud for no good reason. Nepeta, wearing knee-length skirt and a loose blouse (everything hung loose on Nepeta's narrow frame, like Aradia), sat next to her. "Hey, Aradia," she said, in her lighthearted, sweet voice. The high pitch and playful tone of her voice was a nuance Aradia re-noticed about Nepeta's voice all the time.

"Hey, Nepeta," Aradia said.

"Just one week until summer," Nepeta said, splashing the water of the lake with her feet. Aradia smiled.

"I wish we could just jump to summer," she said. "School ends on July sixth this year."

"No kidding," Nepeta agreed. "Ninth grade seemed faster around March. It's almost a wonder we've still got schools, though, because of the war."

Just then, Feferi walked by. "Hi, guys!" she chirped. "How's it going?"

"Pretty good," Aradia said.

"It's great!" Nepeta said. "Almost summer, it's nice out, and…it's just nice."

"I know!" Feferi agreed. "I wish we could have every day of summer be like this."

"Definitely," Aradia agreed.

"But man, it's not summer yet!" Feferi complained. "Just one more week."

"I've heard that there's less school days in India," Nepeta commented.

"But the USA has more, I think," Aradia said. "Well, the fact remains that we have a week left of school. And I think they're still trying to teach us stuff."

"What's the point?" Nepeta asked. "No one's paying attention. It doesn't matter until we have the _bac_*."

"Makes me nervous just thinking about it," Feferi said. "I'm sure I'll do well, but it's the _bac_."

"I guess if we're optimistic, we can relax a bit, at least," Nepeta said. The _bac_ was nerve-wracking, especially in the town in the Pyrénées where they lived. If they didn't want to be farmers, they had to pass the _bac_ and get into college, or if they were really lucky and could hack the two extra years of intense work, the _grande école_. The whole system was rather complicated, but for now they were all worried about the _bac_.

"Feferi!" Feferi's mother called, walking down the road that was at least a mile away. Feferi winced. Aradia half-smiled. It was well known among the sixteen of them that Feferi's mother was rather scary. Aradia's mother was also firmly in the "scary" category.

"Coming, _Maman_!" Feferi called, standing up. "See you guys later."

"See you," Nepeta said, waving. She leaned back and stared up at the sky, feet still in the water. Her own mother was nice and all, if a bit eccentric. And there was the indescribable weirdness of her mother and Karkat's father being engaged or something. Especially considering…but that wasn't important. What she was thinking about now was how they were all going to the lake that Sunday. They just had to get through school tomorrow, which was the average Saturday half-day.

Nepeta sighed. She had just three classes the next day. Saturdays were nice. But sometimes she'd rather have two full days off, like in the USA, instead of two half days and Sunday.

Nepeta glanced at the end of her pale blue skirt and noticed her friendship bracelet dangling in the water. She quickly leaned over to pick up the threads while Aradia opened her book and resumed reading. For once, Aradia was reading in French, not English or Russian or one of the other million languages she knew. "What're you reading?" Nepeta asked.

"Just _The Little Prince_. I haven't read it in a while," Aradia shrugged.

Nepeta nodded, seeing that Aradia wanted to read. Nepeta stared at the sixteen threads in front of her, trying to remember which one she was on. She picked up the burgundy one, Aradia's favorite color *AN: The French education system is rather different from the American one. I know a thing or two about this. I'm just going to use the rough USA approximates for a lot of stuff.

that Nepeta had picked out of her thread box to represent Aradia in this bracelet she was making to represent all her friends. She tied the burgundy onto the ochre one, the mustard yellow, then the slate gray, the olive green, the jade green, the teal…

Nepeta became conscious of the real world after she'd finished sixteen stripes, which took at least a half-hour. She was shaken out of her bracelet-making reverie by Equius, who needed her help in science. Again.

"Nepeta," Equius said.

"Biology homework again?" she guessed, smiling and unpinning the bracelet from the hem of her dress. She coiled it into neat loops around her fingers and stuck the bracelet in her pocket.

"Yes," he said, showing her the worksheet.

"Oh, this isn't hard. It's just about the taxonomy they're using…" she started to explain, while Aradia obliviously read her book, completely immersed in another world. "Come on, sit down," Nepeta said. Equius sat on the log next to her. He leaned over the worksheet, pencil in hand, trying to follow what she was saying.

"It's really not that complicated. So, there's the taxonomy for living beings, right? Kingdom, phylum, class, order…" She went on to explain the new taxonomy system for maybe ten minutes. It was a complicated system.

"Oh. I think I understand now. Thank you, Nepeta," Equius said, when she finished her explanation. He was always grateful for her homework help. She was smarter than he was in almost every subject. But she never seemed to tire of helping him with their homework, even as the year approached its end. He stood to go back to his house, where his father was probably waiting for him and his brother.

"See you, Equius," she said, kissing him quickly before he left.

"Good-bye," he said, walking towards his home.

Nepeta smiled to herself and pinned her bracelet back to her dress. Aradia nudged her.

"So, it's official?" Aradia asked. "You and Equius?"

Nepeta blushed, laughed. "Yep." She was used to Aradia knowing things that other people didn't, and she supposed Aradia was used to Nepeta always knowing about relationships.

It was lovely at the lake that day. All of them came to the lake most days, even in the winter. As far as they knew, no one else even knew the lake existed, except their families (who had no idea where it was).

The lake was small, but big enough for all of them to swim in. It was four kilometers or more outside Cabrières. It was one and a half kilometers or so off the road between Cabrières and Fontès, following a barely visible path through the trees and tall grasses and wildflowers to the lake. The waist-high grasses crept almost down to the edge of the water, until they suddenly ended in a thin strip of pale beach, maybe eight feet (a tiny fraction) on the edge of the lake, before the clear, cool water. There was a large, flat, slate gray rock about halfway around the edge, just large enough for two people to sit on, side-by-side. A draping weeping willow hung over the rock, partially concealing whoever sat on it. Tall trees and grass surrounded the entire lake, except for the three-feet-deep, eight-feet-long stripe of beach. The water was a lovely shade of clear cyan-blue, and always cool. There were two or three tree trunks that had been stuck by lightning that hung over the lake to sit on. Berry bushes grew in the area and the sun was always at least partially blocked by the trees. When the trees ended, after about a mile of forest, there was a huge field of wildflowers and grasses, surrounded by forest on three sides and mountain on one. It was perfect.

Aradia and Nepeta were sitting on the log closest to the beach. Nepeta's toes brushed the water's surface, even though she was the shortest of her friends. Aradia, considerably taller, was up to her shins in the lake. They all wore knee-length skirts in the summer, so at least they didn't have to worry about getting their skirts wet. Some girls still wore skirts to the ankle in summer, but that just seemed ridiculous to Nepeta. That was one of the best parts of summer: no school uniforms.

Aradia blinked. She'd been reading for so long that she hadn't noticed how much time had passed. The sun told her that it was about three o'clock. She had to get home before five, or her mom would go ballistic.

"I've got to go," she said to Nepeta, closing her book and marking her page. "See you tomorrow!"

"See you!" Nepeta said. Aradia stood, walked carefully along the log to the grasses, and hopped onto the shore. She sighed and kept her head down as she followed the road back to Cabrières. Her mother and her sister were both scary, though in different ways. Her mother tended to flip out and yell at Aradia, to make ludicrous threats, to disappear for days at a time and come back as if nothing had ever happened. Her sister, Damara, who was home from college for the summer, was apt to set random things on fire and have random outbursts of anger in the middle of conversations, always in Japanese. Aradia knew a million languages, including Japanese, but her sister spoke so fast and garbled that even if she'd been speaking French, Aradia wouldn't have been able to understand her.

Aradia turned the doorknob with trepidation. She poked her head inside. "And what sort of time do you call this?" Aradia's mom shouted.

"I'm home on time, _Maman_. It's before five, see?" Aradia protested timidly.

"Of course not! You're always late home! You and those terrible friends of yours, corrupting you! Back when your father was alive, he would've put things right! He would've fixed this!"

Aradia stood still and waited for her mother's rage to pass, as it always did. She crossed her arms protectively, tightly, over the bottom of her ribs and looked down. Even though she knew her mother was in the wrong, she always felt ashamed when her mother was yelling at her. "Yes, _Maman_," she said quietly, when her mother had finished yelling. Her mother fumed, looking furious, then marched to the main bedroom. Aradia climbed the stairs to the loft hallway that led to two rooms and one more door. Just her luck to run into Damara in the hallway.

"Hi, Aradia," Damara said, sounding almost normal.

"Hi, Damara," Aradia said cautiously.

"How was your day?" Damara asked.

"Fine," Aradia said, still walking on eggshells around her sister.

"Me too," Damara said pleasantly. But suddenly, Aradia's sister started shouting in Japanese at her, something angry about boys and people and girls and betrayal and death and the war. Aradia backed away. "D-D-Damara?" she stammered. There were a lot of reasons she didn't spend a lot of time at home, or at least around her family. Her sister kept ranting.

Aradia slowly turned around and left, leaving Damara screaming to thin air. Aradia took a key off a bracelet on her wrist and unlocked the door on the end. She climbed the flight of stairs to a sort of balcony, almost like a cutout of the roof, with roofing on all sides. Aradia had set up a small place of safety for herself here. She could see above the entire town, almost to the lake. She had a couple of chairs, a stack of books under a waterproof something she had, and some cushions. She would sit up here with her books and read for hours when her mom and sister were scaring her, which was usually. She pulled one of her favorite books off the top of the stack, settled down in one of the chairs, and began to read.

Nepeta plodded back to her house, not eager to go back home. She loved her mom and her sister, of course, but her mother and Karkat's father had been going out for two years now, and her mother said that she had something important to tell Nepeta and her sister, Meulin. Meulin was home for summer break, like all of their older siblings.

Nepeta opened the front door (which was unlocked) and tried to slip past her mother to her room, which was upstairs. But it didn't work. It never did. "_Cherie_," Nepeta's mom said. "Dear, can you call your sister?"

Nepeta nodded and walked resolutely up the stairs. She knocked on Meulin's door. "Meulin!" she shouted. "_Maman_ is calling us!"

"_J'arrive, petite sœur_," Meulin said. "I'm coming, little sister."

Nepeta walked back downstairs and curled up on her usual bright blue armchair. Her mother sat on the blue couch. Meulin jogged down the stairs and sat on the olive-green chair. "_Qu'est-que c'est, Maman_?" Meulin asked. "What is it?"

"I thought you ought to know that Sigmund and I are getting married in July," Nepeta's mom said excitedly.

Nepeta forced words of congratulations out of her mouth. This was going to be weird. Did that make Karkat her stepbrother? And Kankri? This was just too strange. She shook her head to clear it. The school year was almost over; she could focus on that instead.

"Nepeta? You okay?" Meulin signed.

"Yeah, fine. It's just, remember how I used to have a crush on Karkat?"

"Which you are no officially over?"

"Completely. That's not the point. I dunno. It's just…"

Meulin nodded. "Yeah," she signed. "Don't worry, it'll be like having a brother."

"Great, more siblings."

Meulin smiled. "It'll all be fine in the end."

Days passed. School ended, reports were sent home with plenty of congratulations and some shouting and a few minor threats from the parents who Aradia suspected were not in full control of their mental faculties.

It was the day after school ended. Aradia was sick of being in her house. She took a book she was reading, a book about a Holocaust survivor. She wasn't sure why, but reading books like this was helping her get past her own Holocaust story. Maybe seeing that it was okay to be sad was helping.

She held her book under her arm and walked to the lake. She didn't want to be seen. So she walked silently through the grasses to the rock, where she could sit alone.

Hours passed. The sun started to set when she heard footsteps behind her. The awkward, irregular footfalls of someone who had almost literally grown a foot overnight reminded her of the one person she wanted to be near in that moment.

Sollux peered over her shoulder, trying to see what she was reading. "Dammit, it's in Russian," he said.

Aradia smiled. She read books in so many languages that she didn't even keep track anymore.

"German must've been handy, you know, in the war," Sollux remarked offhandedly.

The words, though not intended to harm, hit Aradia's very core. She was run over painfully, yet again, by the memories of her Aunt Leanne and her father. The day they'd taken them, the day the Nazis had taken her father and aunt. Crashed into their house, taken her father, seen Aunt Leanne move, taken her too. Aradia and Damara and their mother somehow hid in time in the secret room in the basement, for emergencies, and survived. But she knew she'd never forget her Aunt Leanne's screams, her father's quiet resignation, the shouts of "No! Don't take me! I have a family! I have to support them! Please!" from her aunt. Her father had cried their code for, "I'm good as dead, leave without me," in their native French, which luckily the soldiers didn't speak. "_Le fils fait la guerre / elle trouve ça très naturel, la mère_." It was a line of poetry by Jaques Prévert, meaning, "The son fights the war / she finds this very natural, the mother." Aradia had felt like she was dying inside, like part of her was dying with her father. She'd loved her father so much, been close to him. Silent tears had dripped down her face, pooled in her lap.

They'd run to Cabrières the next day. Aradia, claiming that their mother's husband had been killed in the war, that he was a Nazi, by looking young and speaking only German, had somehow been able to get her family to unoccupied France and to the small town where they now lived. That was seven years ago, in 1940, when Aradia was just seven. But every memory was as sharp as the knife blade they used to cut rooster for _coq a vin_.

She started to cry again, like she had that day. Two tears dripped from her eyes and landed in the lake, creating ripples that met and changed and twisted beyond recognition.

Sollux saw her tears, saw the waves that rippled across the lake. "Oh. I'm so sorry, Aradia," he said, sitting down next to her and putting his arm around her. She shrugged.

"It's just, I was really close to my dad," she said. A random memory hit her and she had to say it aloud. "He used to have this rose bush that he would tend to, take care of, all the time. Every summer, when the flowers bloomed, he'd give me a rose, a bright red one. They smelled so wonderful…" Aradia trailed off, putting down her book and looking up at the late afternoon sun.

_Well, I guess this is my cue_, Sollux thought. He held out the red rose he'd bought for her. "This is for you," he said shyly.

Aradia looked at the rose. "It's beautiful," she said. "And it smells lovely." She paused. "There aren't any thorns," she observed, in her non-insulting, constantly honest manner.

"They say that a rose isn't a rose without thorns, but 'a rose by any other name would smell as sweet,'" he said, putting the flower behind her ear.

She blushed. "Thank you," she said quietly. She saw his shy, sweet smile and smiled herself. She turned her face towards him and kissed him for the first time. It tasted like roses and her favorite lavender candies. It was quick, two shy and awkward fifteen-year-olds sharing their first kiss. Aradia blushed a burgundy that matched her favorite color of dark red. "I've had a crush on you since forever," Sollux confessed.

"Me too," Aradia admitted. "Ever since seventh grade."

Sollux timidly took her hand. They sat in silence and watched the sun set, soaking in the rainbow that poured from the sky. At that moment, it seemed impossible that the summer could get any better.


	2. Chapter 2

**Brief A/N: I want to credit my cowriter and sister for all her help on this (and arguments on what you'd name a cow if you lived in France). This isn't the first fic I've ever written but it's the first I've had the guts to publish so please don't be too hard on me! Please leave reviews! **

Chapter 2: Reasons That Working at a Hotel Isn't Fun

Two uneventful weeks passed. School ended on July 6th, and summer began. Nepeta and her friends spent nearly every day at the lake, unbeknownst to their parents. The lake was the place no one could find or disturb. When Sollux had first stumbled on the lake, back in 1939, when they were eight, they'd promised they'd never tell anyone who wasn't their friend. That was before Aradia and Dave and John and Rose and Jade and a lot of their friends moved to Cabrières, and still, just the sixteen of them knew about it.

It was July 21st when things started to happen.

"How nice of you all to come work here!" Feferi's mom said on their first day of work, but there was more than a hint of steel in her voice.

_Like there're a million places to work in this tiny town. Like we want to work here, for_ you, Sollux thought.

"You, in the wheelchair, you work the front desk. You three," She pointed at Nepeta, Kanaya, and Terezi, "Can be maids. And you two," She pointed at Vriska and Karkat, "Can work in the restaurant. You three," She gestured towards John, Dave, and Eridan. "Can be bellhops. And then you two girls," She pointed at Rose and Jade, "Can be greeters. And you can be the handyman," (she pointed at Equius), "And you can do paperwork!" She pointed at Sollux, who was sitting slouched over in an effort to not look so awkwardly tall and lanky.

Feferi tried to smile. Her mom was scary. Since most of the people who normally worked at the hotel were out of town for the summer, it was up to them sixteen to fill in. Well, fifteen, since Aradia was working at the dance studio. No, fourteen, because Gamzee was in Germany, since his whole family had been traitors to the _Résistance_, giving information to the Nazis. Feferi herself was working as the _maître d'_ for the restaurant in the hotel. So her coworkers would be Karkat and Vriska. Lovely. She forced a smile onto her face and said, "Come on, I'll show you what to do."

Aradia ran in with a piece of paper in her hand. "Sollux," she said. "Meant to give this to you."

"Oh, is this another one of your little friends, Feferi?" Feferi's mom asked. "Would you like to work here this summer?"

"Sorry, I'm working at the dance studio," Aradia said, smiling. "And I've got to get back there now before I'm late."

Sollux had been unfolding the note. He read it, smiled. He kissed Aradia and she smiled back. She ran back out the door and turned left, heading for the dance studio. _I'm such a fail at love_, Karkat thought.

_Lucky Aradia_, Feferi thought. _She can work somewhere she likes. And the dance studio has a fan_.

As everyone left, heading for their jobs (Sollux had to work in the office, which was in a room that was too hot and had no natural light, the poor guy), Feferi led her friends to the restaurant.

"This is where I work," she said, gesturing to the little stand with a table list thing on it. "I've got a system for this. You two will work here," she continued, gesturing towards the tables. "Kitchen's over there, and this signal means new customer." She held up three fingers, her thumb and two first fingers. "I'll just hold up the table number. There's some other waiters who can do some of the work, of course. So, that's all! People should be coming around seven."

"Yay," Karkat said sarcastically.

"Sounds like fun," Vriska added, equally sarcastic.

"It's not half bad," Feferi said fairly.

"Yeah, I just love coping with tourists who can't be bothered to learn French," Vriska said sarcastically.

"At least we all speak English and at least two other languages," Feferi pointed out.

"Who fucking cares? It's France, assholes! Speak damn French! At least they could _try_!" Karkat shouted.

"Try to keep the shouting to a minimum when the guests are here," Feferi advised. "Don't worry, this will be fun!"

As predicted, the first guests showed up at seven on the dot. Feferi showed a man in a business suit and a woman in a neon orange pantsuit to table one. Karkat was supposed to be the server. He uncrossed his arms and walked over to the table with resentment in his eyes.

"What do you want to drink?" he asked belligerently. "Soda?"

"No, I'd rather have water," the woman said, in English, giving him a disgusted look. "I'm on a diet to improve my figure."

"Too bad getting water won't improve your ugly face," Karkat said rudely.

"Karkat!" Feferi hissed. "We talked about this!"

"Fine," he conceded. He forced a smile onto his face and said, "And for you, _monsieur_?"

"Just water, too, please," the man said. Karkat nodded and plodded to the kitchen.

Vriska was much better.

"What would you like to drink?" she asked the little girl of the next family. The smile on her face was translucent: not quite obviously faked, but something in it suggested a real, hidden, emotion underneath.

"_Un coca_!" the little girl screeched.

"And for you?" Vriska continued. Feferi sat another family.

Nepeta was not terribly fond of her job. "If we work together, we'll get this done faster," Kanaya pointed out at the start of their day.

"Sure," Nepeta said. "I'll take the sweeping and dusting and bed-making."

"I'll do the furniture polishing and I'll also clean the bathrooms."

"So I guess I'll clean windows and the kitchenettes," Terezi finished, grabbing the window cleaner off the cart. "Let's do this."

Nepeta picked up the broom and resolutely swept the floor of the first room. She made the bed, dusted the dresser and nightstand, and moved on to the next room. The work was rote and backbreaking, not to mention boring. "Kanaya, what did you do with the broom?" Nepeta called.

"Nothing. Must've been Terezi," Kanaya answered, busy wrestling the towels out of the cart.

"I didn't do it," Terezi said. "Whatever it is, it's not my fault."

"Where's the broom?" Nepeta asked.

"Right here," Terezi said. "It smelled like window cleaner."

"How can a broom smell like window cleaner?" Kanaya asked.

"It just does. Like, Kanaya's shirt smells sort of jade-green, and the carpet smells a really horrible shade of purple, and the feather duster smells like the empty basket over there," Terezi shrugged.

"Right then," Kanaya said. "Let's continue working so that we might get to have a few minutes of rest."

Nepeta picked up the broom and entered the next room. "Kanaya?" she called. "I think we need a plumber."

"Why?" Kanaya asked.

"This room is literally flooded with about two inches of water."

"Really?" Terezi asked, entering. "Smells bad, too."

"I don't even want to know what happened here," Nepeta said, shaking her head.

"So what do we do?" Terezi asked.

"Call a plumber," Kanaya answered. She picked up the telephone and dialed the front desk. "Hello? Yes, can you send Equius? I don't know, but there was some form of plumbing mishap…Thanks."

Sollux entered the office. It was on the second floor. There were no windows in the small, poorly ventilated, maybe five by five room. It held a desk, a light bulb, and a desk chair. An in-box on the upper left corner desk overflowed with papers. In the desk drawers were pencils, a pencil sharpener, and erasers. Scratch paper was in a stack in the lower left-hand corner. The other side contained an out-box and an empty space for the math. He started sweating from the moment he stepped in the room.

_The job from hell_, he thought. _And it's hot as hell_.

He sat down at the desk and resolutely pulled off the first paper. A reservation. He searched for the receipt, the reservation list, the list of who'd paid…

He saw filing cabinets under the desk. He sighed and started to organize everything before he could get to the damn math. He decided on alphabetically, but day of check-in. So for today, June 12th, the Fishmans, the Schmidts, and the Mahieus had checked in. He continued to sort the piles of papers with a sense of despair.

Sollux stood, sweaty and exhausted, two hours later, with the papers finally sorted. The paperwork was months behind, since April first, when the hotel opened for the season. He found the red tape for the first week of April, pulled out a pencil and piece of scratch paper, and started resolutely doing the piles and piles of what could've been math worksheets.

Equius had to do all the grunt work around the hotel. Something about the job seemed unnecessarily unpleasant. Except for the fact that he was working at the same place as Nepeta. Possibly the best part of what he was sure would be an otherwise unremarkable summer.

Aradia was supposed to meet Sollux after she was done at the dance studio at five. She worked at the studio from eight to five, Tuesday through Saturday. She'd worked there since she was twelve, because her family needed the money. The owners loved her because she was so good at teaching the little kids. She had a class of five-year-olds last on Wednesdays, like today. The little ballerinas toddled into studio 1, the studio with a fan. There was enough natural light that Aradia turned off the lights and let the light come in through the windows. She turned on the fan and checked the record on the record player. The technology at this studio was so out-of-date, but because of the war, they felt lucky to even have light bulbs.

A group of seven-year-old girls walked in. It was the first ballet class of the day. She looked around at the students and said, "Alright, girls, let's get started."

It was Nepeta's first summer working, and she already hated it. Mrs. Peixes was scary and creepy, not to mention outright mean. A week of boring work with a scary boss should've constituted torture, she thought.

As she dusted another nightstand, lost in thought, she heard a shout. She whirled around to see Kanaya scrubbing a sink and Terezi…where _was_ Terezi?

Then she saw the open window.

Terezi was cleaning the windows and trying not to completely lose her mind from boredom. She was in this for the money, that much was true, but she'd expected the money to be better and the work to be less…torturous. Who had decided that the blind girl should be cleaning the windows?

She worked her way around the room, wiping all the windows clean. She felt the cool, comforting pressure of the glass against her palm and moved on to the next window.

Only, this time there wasn't any glass.

Someone had left the window open.

She called out involuntarily as she tipped over the ledge and started to fall three stories down to the ground.

Karkat heard Terezi scream and ran to the sound. She was falling to the ground and OH SHIT SHE WAS GOING TO DIE! Time seemed to slow down as he ran and threw out his arms to catch her.

Somehow, she landed safely in his arms. He barely caught her. "What the FUCK were you thinking? What the _hell_?"

"I didn't fall out of a window on purpose, moron," she said, gently slapping his face as he set her down. "It was an accident. I was cleaning the windows and some idiot left one open."

"Okay. So you're okay? You are absolutely, positively, completely fucking okay?"

"Yes. I'm fine. Now let me get back to work, jeez."

"If you're sure," he said warily.

"You worry too much," Terezi teased. "If I didn't know better I'd say you liked me."

It was possibly the most awkward, self-conscious laugh Terezi had ever heard when Karkat laughed at her comment. "I've got to get back to work," he stammered, walking back to the restaurant. "See you 'round."

"See ya," Terezi responded, laughing. But the possibility danced in her mind: what if he _did_ like her? What then?

Vriska felt like slapping someone at the restaurant. All these customers were such idiots! The only thing keeping her going was that John had asked her to meet him at the lake the next day, and if she was right, he would finally tell her how he felt.

She sure hoped so.

It wasn't like she'd ever admit it, but she'd been crushing on John since about 1945, two whole years. When he'd moved here in 1943, she'd been the first person at school to talk to him. She'd found out that he lived in Cabrières and they'd quickly made friends. She'd go over to his house every day, do homework, make dinner, hang out. She knew his dad almost as well as she knew her sister. So it wasn't too surprising to her when she realized she liked him. It was a surprise, however, when she found out he might like her, back in 1946. Maybe tomorrow he'd finally confess.

Sundays were always full of promise.

John was shaky as he walked to the lake to meet Vriska. He was going to confess to her today. Today. What had he gotten himself into? What if she didn't like him? He'd like her from the moment he met her, back in '43, when he'd moved here in the thick of the war. And now he was going to tell her.

What had he gotten himself into?

Vriska was wearing a nice dress for once when he saw her. She hardly ever dressed up if she could help it. Almost never. So maybe she was dressed up because she saw this as a date? He didn't know.

"Hey," she said.

"Hi," he answered.

"Want to climb the willow?" she asked. When he hesitated, she added, "Oh, come _on_. It's fun!" She grabbed him by the hand and pulled him over to the tree in question, which she proceeded to vault up like she had wings. He followed at a slower pace.

When they finished climbing, they sat in the weeping willow as high as the branches would hold them. It was beautiful, and not just because he could see over both small towns and all the way to the distant mountains. The flowered hills and mountains were spread before them like they went on forever. Vriska was across from him, her long blond hair ever so slightly lifted by the wind. She was so beautiful in her knee-length blue dress, her glasses perched on the bridge of her nose as her gray eyes examined a leaf. She somehow managed to look as graceful and beautiful as a ballerina, despite her lack of grace on the ground. "You look beautiful," he blurted, without thinking.

She looked up in surprise and raised an eyebrow. She blushed a soft pink and looked down at her feet. "Thanks," she said quietly. She wasn't acting like her usual self.

All rational thought seemed to vanish from his mind. "Want to kiss?" he blurted again.

She looked up at him in utter shock. But then her face softened into gentle laughter. _I really screwed it up this time_, he thought. "Sure, why not," she said.

_I'm going to kiss a girl_, John thought. _Wait, what do I do? Should I pucker my lips? Lean in? Close my eyes? What the hell am I supposed to do?_ He wasn't like Dave, who'd had a "secret" girlfriend in fifth grade.

Vriska leaned forward, one hand on the branch she sat on and one hand on the branch perpendicular to the ground. He pushed himself forward, just a bit. He still had no idea what to do, and for some reason, he had the idea to rest one hand on her shoulder. As she came closer and closer, he lifted one of his hands just as she rested her hand on his shoulder. But when he'd moved forward, he'd used his hands to support himself. So when he lifted one hand, he was no longer sitting on the branch.

He pinwheeled his arms as he fell, face forward, towards the lake. The water rushed up to meet him and he landed in a belly flop with a huge splash.

Dave and Terezi were sitting on the edge of the lake, on the beach, when a person-sized object smashed into the water. It was John. "Where the hell did he come from?" Dave asked. "Did my bro just plummet from the sky?"

They looked up to the willow, where Vriska stood with her hands clamped over her mouth as she stared at the water below. Her eyes were wide and shocked. She pulled her hands away from her mouth and said, "That wasn't my fault this time, I _swear_." She disappeared from the tree, climbing down.

"What the…?" Dave wondered aloud. He glanced from Vriska, who was wearing a nice dress, to John, and back again. "Oh."

Terezi rolled her eyes. Trust John to screw up his first kiss. She dove into the lake and swam over to where John was floating, face up, looking extremely despairing. She dragged him to the beach while Vriska climbed down from the tree. "This is the only time I save your sorry ass, got it?" Terezi asked John while she knelt next to him to make sure he was still breathing.

"Hey, TZ," Dave said. "It's not cool to hit, or hit on, my bro."

Terezi stood. She saw that Dave standing on the very edge of the lake. She place one hand gently on his chest and pushed him. "Well fuck," he said calmly as he tipped backwards into the lake. He came up soaking wet and laughing.

Vriska came up behind Terezi. Now was a perfect time to push Terezi into the lake so she was out of the way. But Terezi was smarter than that. Terezi's hand shot out and locked onto Vriska's wrist as she fell. John, who had recovered and was standing, put his arms around Vriska's waist to keep her from falling in the lake. But he tumbled, along with Vriska and Terezi, into the water.

When he burst the surface, they were all laughing. John joined in with them. Vriska splashed Terezi and Terezi splashed back. "Water fight!" Dave shouted, and they were all splashing each other and laughing, swimming around the lake, fully clothed, as they swam and splashed and laughed.

Karkat was about an hour of his dad, who was coming to the lake that day to make sure it was "appropriate" or some shit. He trudged towards the lake, head down, and hoped that it would be empty. His friends would murder him for this. No one was supposed to know about the lake.

Vriska, John, Dave, and Terezi were floundering in the lake and having a great time. "What the fuck are you doing?" Karkat asked.

"Water fight!" Dave shouted, still wearing his glasses.

Karkat stared for a second. "What the hell. I'm in," he said, jumping into the lake and joining the water fight.

It must've been forty-five minutes later. Karkat was still water fighting with his friends. He noticed Terezi swimming towards Dave. He hoped that it wasn't…

Terezi had had a crush on Dave for so long. This was her chance. She swam over to him, threw her arms around him, and kissed him. He wrapped his arms around her waist. They stayed locked together for a very long moment, maybe several long minutes. She didn't know. The next thing she felt was a huge splash. They involuntarily broke apart. Terezi stared immediately at Karkat, who held his hands up in surrender and pointed at Vriska. Terezi glared at Vriska, who looked distinctly confused.

Vriska recovered quickly, however. "Go for it, girl!" she shouted.

Terezi buried her face in Dave's shoulder and neck, but she looked happy.

Karkat caught John trying to catch his eye. "You okay?" John asked, swimming over to him.

"I'm fucking fine, moron," Karkat said, rolling his eyes. "Oh shit, my dad's coming." He clambered out of the lake and sat on the shore, trying to dry off his pants and shirt and having little luck. He was rubbing a random leaf violently over his face when his dad turned the corner on the path and saw him.

"Karkat," his father began sternly.

"We were just swimming, _Papa_. I swear," Karkat said, standing up quickly.

"We're going back home. Come with me, Karkat," his father said. As he followed his dad back home, he thought he heard his father mutter something about indecency.

Later that day, when Karkat was sitting at his desk with a page of the newspaper in the main room, Kankri and Latula walked in, holding hands. Karkat had his face on the desk, his nose smashed against the hard wood.

"Are you alright?" Kankri asked.

"I'm fucking fine," Karkat said.

"Of course," Kankri said, slightly sarcastically.

"What makes you think that?" Karkat asked.

Kankri rolled his eyes. "Oh, I know what it is," Latula said in a teasing tone. "It's about…"

"Shut the fuck up," Karkat said.

"Oh, because of Terezi and Dave," Kankri said knowingly.

"Seriously. Shut. The. Fuck. Up," Karkat said, hitting himself on the head with a newspaper.

Latula smiled. Kankri was still holding her hand. _Lucky_, Karkat thought. _My stupid, lucky brother_.

"That's so adorable! I bet Terezi doesn't even know she has two boys fighting over her," Latula said.

"Fuck you," Karkat said. He paused for a second for effect. "No, wait, that's Kankri."

"I hate you," Kankri said.

Karkat looked up from the desk. "That's some pretty strong language coming from _you_."

"Wow, with an attitude like that, I wouldn't let her go out with you," Latula said.

"Like she'd listen to you," Karkat said sarcastically.

"Well, yeah, she would. Because she respects me, unlike you and Kankles."

"First of all, that's because Kankri is an idiot. And second: Kankles? Really?"

"So I'm not an idiot?" Latula shot back.

"No, you're an idiot too. You're just not an insufferable idiot." He glared at Kankri.

Latula half-smiled and walked out, still holding Kankri's hand. Karkat stayed sitting in the chair, face on the desk, for a very long time.

He was still facedown, head on the desk, when someone knocked on the door. "Come in," he said miserably. It might be someone for his dad or brother.

"Are you alright?" Nepeta asked when she walked in.

"I'm. Fucking. Fine," he reiterated.

"No, you're really not," she said, sitting next to him.

"And how do you know?" he asked belligerently.

"You're sitting with your face smushed on the desk looking hopeless and heartbroken," she said honestly. "It's not hard to figure out."

"It's nothing," he said.

"Well, if it helps, it won't last," she said.

He shot upright. "How the hell did you figure it out?"

"Isn't it obvious?" she asked. "I mean, you're always glancing at her in Wednesday double history, and at lunch…or is that just me? Well, that doesn't matter. It won't last."

"How can you tell?" he asked, still discouraged.

"I just know. I don't know, I just always figure out stuff like this. Anyways. Remember Dave's last girlfriend, Colette? He cheated on her. Big-time. I mean, he felt bad about it, I think, but she broke up with him because of that."

"That lasted a fucking year," he protested. "It's going to suck to wait a whole fucking year. I have no luck at love."

"She was dumb. Terezi's smart. She'll figure out sooner, and anyways, Latula hates him."

"Seriously. How the fuck do you figure this stuff out?"

"It's the way Latula looks at him. And she talks to your brother, who I might add never shuts up. Easy. And you know how important Latula is to Terezi," Nepeta said. "Latula definitely likes you better than him."

"How soon is soon?"

"I'd give it weeks, honestly. I'm sure it won't last long at all, even by our standards," Nepeta reinforced. "Before this bizarreness that will be a wedding. Anyways, remember, every heartbreak seems like it's the end of the world, but it takes you one step closer to the person you'll love forever."

"What would _you_ know about heartbreak?" he asked belligerently. What could this ever-optimistic, always happy cat-girl know about the pain of heartbreak?

She paused. He really had no idea how much she'd loved him for all those years. "It's complicated," she sighed. "I mean, it's really…complicated."

"Is. That. All. Girls. Ever. Say. It's. Fucking. Complicated," he said, punctuating each word by slamming his face on the desk, pausing to add air quotes to "complicated."

"Well, you guys don't really get it," she said. "It's comp—it's confusing, even for us. I just happen to be good at reading people."

Karkat nodded. "Are you sure?"

"Almost positive," she said, trying to sound self-assured.

Karkat slumped back in his chair. He was so frustrated with this whole fucking thing! He kicked the chair backwards. He lost his balance and tipped over onto the floor. "Ouch."

Nepeta was trying not to laugh. "Come on, stand up," she said. "Let's go swimming."

"You and me?" he asked, weirded out.

"Yes…" she said, completely nonplussed.

"You and me?" he asked again, sensing romance.

She rolled her eyes. "Yes, you and me and Equius and Feferi. Completely platonic, I promise. Eridan won't be there, so you don't have to worry about him. You'll feel better after a good swim. Come on."

"Fine," he said, grumpily standing and following her to the lake.

As they walked, she thought of all the reasons it was "complicated." She'd liked Karkat for years and never said a thing. She just couldn't, even now. It had broken her heart to know he didn't like her. It just killed her. But Equius, in trying to help her feel better, turned out to be the one she really loved. There was so much more to it than that, but she just did not have the mental energy to go over the last four years in her head. Especially June 6th, 1944. The worst day of her life. The day her dad died.

She remembered D-Day like it was yesterday. She thought of it as she walked with Karkat to the lake. The day of the landings. Her dad had been one of the soldiers in the boats, fighting the Nazis, because he was drafted in 1943. He was also part of the _Résistance_, she knew. But he'd been shot, on the beaches. When she was little, he'd always said that once Meulin and Nepeta had gone on to lead their own lives, her mother and him would move to Normandy and grow old on the beaches. On those beautiful beaches, the only thing she could think of was her father, dead on the very beach he'd said he'd grow old at.

They were at the beach by the lake. She realized she was crying when a tear hit her arms, habitually crossed over diaphragm. And then she couldn't stop the tears. Everyone else was swimming, but she sat on the shore while her shoulders convulsed with sobs. Usually, thinking about her dad didn't hurt this much. She didn't understand it. Why did it hurt so much today? All the reasons it was hard hit her at once. The third year since her dad died. And they were at the beach, which so resembled the place her father had died. And her mother was getting married again. She knew her mother and father's marriage had been happy, but she also knew that her mother loved Karkat's father. There was just so much.

Equius sat next to her. He put his arm around her as her shoulders shook and the tears pooled on her chest. He barely touched her, but there was something comforting in the gesture. He worried about hurting her, she knew. She wrapped her arms around him as her sobs began to subside. "I miss him," she said hoarsely. "A lot."

"I know," Equius said. He kissed her forehead gently.

She swallowed her sobs and forced a smile onto her face. "Come on, let's go swimming."

"But you're not okay," he said. "What's wrong?" He sounded so concerned, so worried about her.

"What the fuck?"

"I told you! I think women should have equal rights for jobs and stuff!"

"What's the point of that? Women are better at cooking and shit."

"Fuck you."

"You'd like that."

"Shut the fuck up. If you can't accept that women are just as smart as men, the GTFO." She opened the door and held it that way, looking angry but keeping her head high.

As soon as he left, she started crying.

Karkat was supposed to return a book he'd borrowed from Terezi that day. His face was slightly flushed and he could feel himself getting nervous. What if he said something stupid again? Or he accidentally let something slip? His nerves were getting the better of him.

He walked in the door, which was of course unlocked, to see Terezi crying on the floor. "I…uh…hi?" he said.

"Oh," she said, quickly blinking tears from her eyes and rubbing her face. "Hi."

"Are you okay?" he asked, sitting next to her.

She shrugged and made a sort of helpless gesture with one hand. "I…it's complicated."

"Seriously?" he asked. "You're crying in the corner and you're just saying what every other girl does when they're feeling shitty: it's 'complicated!'"

"It is, though," she said, sounding miserable. "I…man, where do I start?"

"The beginning?"

"I guess that would be back at the lake, two weeks ago. When I kissed him. I dunno. I really liked him and he was next to perfect and I thought I loved him. And it was great for two weeks, but then I was saying how my aunt works and none of us are good at cooking. And he said that women belong in the kitchen, so I basically said GTFO and I know I shouldn't be upset because I was the one who broke it off but I am…" She was still crying quietly, and clearly trying not to.

"So why did you end it?" he asked, confused.

"Because if he couldn't respect that I have my own career goals and dreams and _life_, well, he _can_ get the fuck out of here. But I still really like him, and I think he likes me. Or liked."

"So, if he didn't respect you, don't you think it's better that he's gone?"

"No! I miss him already," she said. "Don't you have any idea what it's like to love someone and then just watch as they leave?"

_Yes_, he thought. _Of course I do. What do you think I've been feeling over you? _But aloud he said, "Yeah, I do. It's hard, isn't it?"

She nodded miserably, curling tighter in on herself.

"Well…I'm sorry," he said. "I guess that sucked for you. But also, _he_ lost _you_. He lost a beautiful, wonderful person who loved him. So in my opinion, it's his loss. He could've had _you_. But now he's going to get some empty-headed broad and you will b able to do what you want and have some guy who respects you and cares about you."

She nodded.

He remembered something Nepeta had said to him when Terezi first went with Dave. "So, uh, want to go to the lake? I bet you'll feel better after a good swim."

She started to cry again. _What is it—oh. Oh…_he thought. _Right…well, shit._

"How about the field?" he tried again. "It's all…calm and full of flowers and shit."

She shrugged, almost helplessly. "Sure," she said, a trace of a sniffle and a tear in her voice. "But…maybe tomorrow."

He had to cover up his disappointment. He so wanted to go to the field or lake with her. "How about I meet you around four at the lake?" he tried.

"Asking me out, are you?" she teased, but with none of her usual lighthearted, mocking air.

He blushed nonetheless. "Uh…" he said.

"Oh, I'm just messing with you," she said, slapping his arm lightly, still lacking her usual tone of voice. She blinked twice, then once more. "Thanks, Karkles," she said.

He worked up the courage and hugged her. "You're welcome," he said. "See you tomorrow."

"See you," she said.

The next day, at exactly four-thirty PM, Terezi knocked on the door. Kankri, who was once again sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of Earl Gray Tea, opened the door. Karkat ran to the door and literally shoved his brother out of the way before Kankri opened his mouth. "Hi, Terezi," he said awkwardly. "Sorry about my IDIOT BROTHER!" he added, shouting the last two words to the rest of the house.

"Man, poor Karkles," she teased. "Come on. To the field!" That teasing, lighthearted tone was back in her voice. She must be feeling better.

It was a slow walk to the lake for once. Normally, anyone who went to the lake was going fast, getting away from that tiny town. But they walked slowly and it was nice. Taking time to smell the roses for once.

They didn't even stop at the lake. They walked on the narrow footpath they'd created over the years, picking berries as they walked. "It's really nice out today," Karkat said awkwardly.

"The weather?" she asked. "You're talking about the weather?"

"Shut up," he answered.

"Why? Do I make you nervous?" she teased.

He blushed. "A little," he confessed.

"Really," she said, and her face turned pink, too. "Come on, to the field!"

He felt like giggling, which he never did. Why did she have that effect on him? He shook his head and jogged after her, until they finally reached the field.

"Okay," he said. "How long was that walk? Because we left around five and now it's almost fucking eight! Hell, the sun's setting!"

"And why are you flipping your shit?"

"My dad, he's super strict when it comes to curfew…he wants me home by nine-thirty because we have church tomorrow."

"Your point?"

"He'll fucking kill me."

"Not if you come up with a good story."

"Like what?"

"Does it matter? It's simple logic: if your dad doesn't know where you are, he has no way to prove you were doing something wrong. You told me he's always asleep by your curfew anyways, so, he has literally no way to prove that you were any where at any time."

"And how to fuck do you figure that? He's my dad!"

"My aunt's a lawyer. My mom was, too, before…you know."

"Yeah."

"It's getting really dark out."

"How did you figure that out?"

"The colors smell darker."

"That's…pretty fucking weird."

"I've smelled and tasted colors and objects since I was little, even before I was blind."

"You weren't born blind?"

"Nope. Happened when I was, eight or nine. I don't even remember anymore. Doesn't matter," she tossed off like it was nothing.

"But it's not nothing, it's how you lost your _sight_."

"I never liked seeing much anyways."

"_What_?"

"I always preferred closing my eyes and listening, or using my sense of smell. I was never much for sight."

"You are very weird."

"Thank you."

He smiled. She gave him that shit-eating grin that gave him butterflies. He felt all weird and shaky inside.

"Come here often?" Terezi teased, gesturing at the field where he'd probably spent half his life.

"Yeah," he said. "Since I was eight. You?"

"Since 1938."

"That will be an impressive statement around…2013 or so," Karkat pointed out.

"Yeah, well, that's a very long way off."

"But think about it. When we're all…eighty or so, it will be quite impressive to say that we've been coming to that lake since 1938."

"I can also say I lived in Avignon before _la guerre_."

"Man, I can say I lived in the South of France _pendant la guerre_, during the war."

"That'll impress some theoretical grandkids."

"No fucking kidding."

There was a very long silence. But it was not at all uncomfortable. The two of them sat in the field and watched the sun set.

Terezi was happy, and the feeling left her lighter than she'd been before. It was strange; whenever she read in books that happiness left you "feeling lighter", she thought it was bogus. But…here it was. For real. She crossed her fingers (even though she didn't believe in luck) and opened her mouth to say something.

"I've liked you for a long time," she admitted. "But I thought you didn't care."

"I've had a crush on you since first grade," he said honestly.

They sat in silence for a long moment, looking up at the inky black night sky.

"Can you describe the stars for me?" Terezi asked.

"Well," Karkat began, unsure. "It's like…a huge, dark blue sky. Can you imagine that? And it goes on forever. But all over the place, there's these tiny dots of light. And they almost make shapes. It's almost as beautiful as you are." He blushed, but she smiled. "Can you describe that?"

"No," she said. "It's really more something you feel, isn't it?"

"Yes," he agreed. "It's more a feeling than something you can see. But what does it feel like?"

"It feels like this," she said. She turned his face to hers and kissed him, sweetly and softly. It felt exactly like diving into the lake: he couldn't see, or hear, or sense anything but a strange tingling on his skin, but there was a floating, a joy in being so light. Like looking at the stars. It tasted like her strawberry lip-gloss and felt like it would never end, as they lied in the grass and kissed.

It was late when they finally broke apart, too late to think of going back home. She looked at him and he smiled, feeling shy and small, but happy.

They were holding hands, looking at the stars, not talking. She rolled over to lie on her side, pressed against his side. She fell asleep with her arm over his chest, curled up against his side. There was a sense that she trusted him, that she could drop her guard around him. No one had ever really trusted him before. His dad doubted everything he did, and his brother never seemed to trust him to do even the simplest of things. But she trusted him, felt safe around him. He fell asleep with his arm around her, feeling a safety in being out here in the field where it seemed nothing could ruin their happiness.

The next morning, when they woke up, he realized what his dad would say. Terezi blinked, woke up. "What is it, Karkles?" she asked, immediately noticing the look on his face.

"My dad," he said. "He's going to fucking kill me."

"Let's go then," Terezi said. When he took a second to stand, she grabbed his arm with a mischievous smile and said, "Come on, Karkles."

When he got home, he'd come up with a good story. He'd just spent the night in the field with his friends. Nothing suspicious that his strict Catholic father could get upset over, right? But then, he could never do anything right in his father's eyes. But when he opened the door, his lie of a story on his lips, it was Kankri sitting at the kitchen table, home from university, with a mug of Earl Gray tea. Almost worse. "Look, I swear it was nothing, I was spending the night with some friends in the field…" But Kankri didn't look disapproving. He just sat there with his tea. Karkat was immediately suspicious.

"You're in luck," Kankri said. "Dad had to leave early for church. As far as he knows, you came home after he fell asleep around nine PM."

Karkat was so shocked that he didn't say a word for a very long moment. "Thank you so fucking much," Karkat said gratefully. "I thought I was dead."

"You're welcome," Kankri said smugly.

"How are you not fucking worried about me?" Karkat asked. "Latula's seriously had an effect on my old fucking uptight brother."

"Also, I knew where you were. I could've found you any time."

"What the fuck?" Karkat shouted. "How?"

"Let me illustrate for you," Kankri said.

"What the hell?" Karkat reiterated.

"About five seconds into our date, Terezi ran in and said, 'I'm going to the field with Karkat. 'Kay? 'Kay? Good.' And then when she running out she said, 'Oh, hi Kankri.' And then I asked Latula how she knew I was there if she was blind and she said…"

"Okay, I fucking get it."

"May I just say that you are dating the gutsiest girl in all of France."

"Why, what did she walk in on you two doing?"

Kankri blushed scarlet.

"Wow, seriously?" Karkat started laughing. "That's hysterical!"

Kankri held his head in his hands.

"Why aren't you at church?" Karkat questioned suddenly. "You always go."

Kankri blushed a deeper crimson. "I spent—er, that is, I mean to say of course…"

"You spent the night with Latula," Karkat stated. "Dad's going to murder you if he finds out."

"He thinks I was home all night and I left early for a job," Kankri admitted.

"My older brother's being more irresponsible than I am."

"Not important! _I_ don't live here."

"Nice comeback. You're still here for the summer."

"I'll be leaving for university again in the fall."

"Nice," Karkat said, rolling his eyes. "Whatever. I won't tell if you don't."

"Fine," Kankri agreed.

"Anyways, it really was nothing. I swear," Karkat said.

"I believe you," Kankri stated simply.

"Thanks," Karkat said gratefully, walking to his room. He was about to leave the room when he turned and added, "Wait. Doesn't she have a boyfriend?"

"Shut up! They broke up and he moved to Czechoslovakia," Kankri protested, blushing even redder.

"How is it that you are twenty-one years old and I still manage to embarrass you easily?"

"Just shut up. I will tell Dad. And don't think I can't lie to our father, just to get back at you," Kankri threatened.

"If you tell, I will," Karkat shot back.

Kankri rolled his eyes. "Okay. Whatever. Please, leave me alone now."

Karkat couldn't resist one last dig. "Well, there goes being a priest," he said as he walked upstairs.

Kankri started to repeatedly hit his head on the table in exasperation.

Karkat wasn't tired at all, even though he'd fallen asleep late last night and woken up early this morning. He lied on his bed and stared at the ceiling and hoped that his dad wouldn't come home for a long, long time.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Karkat and His Inability to Talk to Girls

**A/N: Much thanks to my sister/cowriter for helping with the research for this chapter! I had to split this chapter because it's really long, so the ending might be a bit awkward. Cabrières is a real town in the south of France, near Nîmes. I took some liberties with the description, but I did the best I could to be accurate. **

Nepeta fidgeted in the uncomfortable dress her mother had chosen for the bridesmaids. She tried not to move too much in the heels that made her feet ache and her knees stiff. She stood perfectly still while the priest rambled on about marriage and love and something-or-other she didn't listen to and didn't care about. She knew that Karkat's dad was a strict Catholic, so the ceremony was a Catholic one. They were Catholic, too (nearly everybody was), but not as strictly as Karkat's dad.

Karkat hated the stiff suit he was wearing. The shoes were awful, too, way too small. He'd referred to it as the "death suit" quietly as soon as his father told him it was a July wedding in a church. Terezi had laughed, because she got to wear a dress. Lucky.

The ceremony dragged on for at least two days. Or that's what it felt like to both Karkat and Nepeta. The thought drifted through Nepeta's mind that she didn't know how her mother and her now stepfather were still smiling. Her mom was even crying. They were a sentimentalist family.

"You may now kiss the bride," the priest said. There was a brief pause when no one moved. Then Terezi stood up and shouted, "What are you waiting for? Kiss the pretty girl!" Latula cringed and punched Terezi in the gut. Terezi sat back down and whispered to her sister, "Well, fuck you too!"

Karkat cringed, too. He hoped his dad didn't make the connection that this was his girlfriend. But his dad smiled and kissed Nepeta's mom.

Kankri glared at Karkat. Karkat rolled his eyes and wished for this whole shebang to end. He hated when his brother gave him that condescending look. Like Kankri wasn't annoying enough.

After the ceremony, but before the reception, Karkat asked Kankri, "Why'd you glare at me like that?" They were in a hallway off the main one in the hotel where the reception was. Everyone else was in the main room, celebrating.

"That was your girlfriend!"

"I have no control over her!"

"Obviously!"

"Do you _want_ me to become a controlling and fucking abusive boyfriend?"

"No, but at least you can ask her to not yell rude comments at our father's wedding! At least my girlfriend isn't senseless and clearly unintelligent!"

"Well, at least my girlfriend isn't a poser and sl—" Karkat began, intending to say "a poser and a slut." But Kankri slapped his hand over Karkat's mouth and said awkwardly, "Hey, Latula, Terezi." He glared at Karkat and put his hand back in his pocket.

"Did we miss something?" Latula asked.

"Nothing," Kankri and Karkat said at the same time.

"This is what we get for dating brothers," Latula said to Terezi.

"This is what we get for dating sisters," Karkat shot back.

"Well, if you'll excuse me, Kankri and I were going to dance," Latula said, pulling Kankri to the main room.

There was a pause in which Terezi and Karkat looked awkward. Then she smiled. "Come on," she said, taking his arm and dragging him to the main room.

Later that night, Terezi and Karkat were on the dance floor, swaying to a slow song.

He must've looked really awkward, because she said quietly, "You know you can tell me anything, Karkat. Don't you trust me?"

_Oh shit_, he thought. _A trap_.

"What happened between you and Kankri earlier?" she asked.

"It's not important."

"Well, it's obviously bugging you, and you're my boyfriend, and I care about you, so yes, it's important," she said tenderly.

"Well, he got pissed at me because of what you said at the ceremony and we said some pretty nasty stuff."

"It can't be that bad."

He took one hand off her waist and scratched the back of his neck.

"There's more, isn't there?" she asked.

He nodded. "Well, then he started saying stuff about you, so I started saying stuff about…your sister," he said, the last words inaudible.

"What did you say?" she asked.

"Stuff…about…your sister," he said slowly.

"Like what?" she asked.

"It's not important," he said, exasperated. He did not want to talk about this.

She pulled her hands off his shoulders. "It is important, because it's my sister!"

"Well, he sort of said that you were senseless and stupid, so I said she was a poser and a sl—" He clamped his own hands over his mouth as his eyes widened. But she had heard and figured it out. She took a step away from him and let her jaw drop slightly.

"I didn't mean it!" he protested. "I was just mad!"

"What does being mad have to do with insulting my sister?" she shouted.

"I didn't mean it, really! I was just so sick of holding it in and not saying anything about stuff and then he got me mad and—" But she was already walking off.

"You were holding stuff like that in about my sister?" she asked incredulously.

"No! I mean, yes, I mean, no, sort of, it's like, my brother and…"

"I thought you were better than that," she said. "Guess not."

"But wait!" he yelled, chasing after her. But she'd already left. _Not only have I managed to fuck things up with my brother, but with my girlfriend, too_, he thought.

Feeling hopeless, he plodded miserably to the balcony. Just before he opened the door, Sollux said, "Wow, you really fucked up this time."

Karkat turned and slapped Sollux across the face before marching outside and slamming the door behind him.

Aradia poked Sollux's shoulder. He jumped and nearly dropped the tray of champagne glasses he was carrying.

"Jeez, what's his problem?" Sollux asked, rubbing the red mark on his face.

"You really should go talk to him," Aradia said. "Didn't you see how red his eyes were?"

"No!"

"You are such an idiot sometimes," Aradia said affectionately, shaking her head and smiling. "You're supposed to be his best friend. Shouldn't you talk to him about whatever happened with Terezi?"

"How did you figure that out?" he asked.

"I saw Terezi storming away from him. It was pretty obvious."

"Fine," Sollux conceded, opening the door to the balcony.

Karkat was flopped over the balcony railing when he heard the door creaking open.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fucking fine," Karkat said.

"Yeah. Sure," Sollux said sarcastically. There was a pause. "Want a champagne?"

"What the hell?" Karkat asked.

"I'm paid to do this. I don't care if you want champagne or not."

"Nice to know nobody cares."

"Not about your champagne preferences, no. But about other stuff," Sollux said.

"Yeah. As if."

"Hey, I care. I know you fucked up with Terezi big-time."

"Don't remind me."

"All you have to do is apologize," Sollux advised.

"And how do you know this sort of thing?"

"I've fucked with Aradia before."

"That sounds so wrong," Karkat said.

Sollux cringed. "You know what I mean. Shit, please tell me she didn't hear that."

"Whatever. How the hell can I apologize to her?" he asked.

"I have no fucking clue. Girls are so damn weird."

"Thank you for that wonderfully fucking deep enlightenment."

"At least you're not ranting to me. That gets pretty fucking annoying," Sollux said.

"I'm too fucking miserable to string two sentences together," Karkat said.

"Dude, are you crying?" Sollux said.

Karkat brushed away a tear. "No."

"Wow, she must mean a lot to you, if the great and powerful Karkat Vantas is _crying_."

"Your sarcasm is not fucking appreciated."

"You could go to Nepeta for advice. She's technically your sister now, and she's pretty knowledgeable about this shit."

"Are you fucking serious?"

"Yeah. I mean, she'll understand. It doesn't make sense, but whenever you say something insulting about a girl's family, she flips her shit. It's weird."

"Yeah, I get it, I'd be pissed if someone was more obnoxious to Kankri than he deserves, but still!"

"I know. It's some weird overprotectiveness."

"I hate dating people." He rested his head on the railing.

"Obviously not, because you're crying over her."

"Shut up! I am not fucking crying!"

"Yeah, you're sweating through your eyes."

There was a pause while Karkat flopped over the balcony rail.

"You probably shouldn't say anything today to her, because she's probably still pissed, but you might want to check with your brother."

"Why?"

"Because there might be some indirect insulting with you insulting Latula and not meaning it and telling Terezi who might tell Latula who then breaks up with your brother."

"That doesn't even make sense."

"Never said it did," Sollux said. "By the way, you might want to be ready."

"For what?"

"You have to give a speech for your dad later."

"WHAT THE FUCK?" He was deathly afraid of public speaking.

"Oh. You didn't know?"

"NO!"

"Oh. Well, good luck."

"Don't you have anything to help?"

There was another pause. "Champagne?" Sollux asked.

"I DON'T WANT YOUR FUCKING CHAMPAGNE! GO PEDDLE CHAMPAGNE TO SOMEONE ELSE WHO FUCKING CARES!" Karkat screamed.

"All you had to say was no," Sollux said, rolling his eyes. He walked back inside with the tray of champagne glasses to see Aradia staring at him.

"How did it go?"

"As well as it could've gone."

"He was screaming at you."

"Welcome to the world of brotherly love."

"Boys are so weird."

"How do you think we feel about girls?"

"It's not that complicated," Aradia protested.

"Yes, it is."

Aradia smiled and took his arm, walking back to the main room.

Karkat took a deep breath and rubbed his face, hoping to wipe away the redness in his eyes. If he had to make a speech, at least he could do it without his face looking so fucking awful.

He walked inside and to the main room, where his brother put a hand on his shoulder and said, "It's almost time, Karkat."

"Fuck," Karkat muttered. He'd hoped that he might have some time to come up with something. Maybe he could stall until he came up with something?

He stood by the side of the stage, where he spotted Sollux. "What was the point of the champagne?" Karkat asked.

"Maybe you could get drunk enough that you wouldn't care," Sollux shrugged.

"I'm fifteen!"

"So? Everyone's been drunk."

"Yeah right."

"Tavros got drunk once."

"That must've been damn weird."

"He just cried in a corner until he passed out, I think."

"Has Aradia ever been drunk?" Karkat asked, curious.

"Yeah." Sollux paused, remembering. "It was weird and very scary."

"What about _you_?"

"My brother said I'm a crazy drunk."

"Since when have we believed _anything_ your brother says? My brother got drunk once and it was hilarious."

"How'd he get drunk?"

"I dunno, I think Latula gave him beer or something."

"DON'T EVEN BRING THAT BITCH UP!" Sollux shouted.

"Your brother now lives in Czechoslovakia!"

"That is mostly fucking _irrelevant_!"

"Look, I've already had some wine! I'm fine!"

"How much is some?"

"Why?"

"There's two empty glasses over there and you're holding a third."

"I'm fine. I think I have to go talk now."

"Good luck," Sollux said. "You're going to need it."

Karkat climbed onstage and crossed his fingers. The room was not entirely in focus and he felt his balance almost give way. Maybe he shouldn't have drunk that wine.

"Okay, first of all, this speech is going to suck because I just found out I was supposed to says something about five minutes ago," Karkat began.

Nepeta, who was standing with Equius right behind her mom and stepdad, heard her stepdad whisper to her mom, "I forgot to tell him, didn't I?"

Nepeta's mom nodded.

Karkat continued. "Well, first of all, this wedding has been weird for all of us. Who would've thought that Sigmund would've married Diana, who is now my stepmom. Which makes Nepeta and Meulin my stepsisters. Which is weird. It's also weird because Diana ignored that Kankri and I are huge screw-ups. And my dad ignored the fact that Meulin and Nepeta are also screw-ups. But I guess that's actually nice, because they both ignored that fact that they would be getting a bunch more screw-ups to keep track of and the fact that this is pretty weird and got married anyway.

"I mean, love is blind. Even though there was a lot of weirdness surrounding this whole thing, the two of them fell in love and got married anyways. Because it really doesn't matter, if two people love each other. They always say that justice is blind, but love is too. Because they were in love, Sigmund and Diana got married even though everyone said it was crazy."

Terezi, off to the right side, smiled a little at the "love is blind." She was still pissed, but she smiled.

"It's actually really nice to think about. That no matter what comes between them, two people who love each other will always find their way back to each other. A lot of things came between my dad and Diana. The war, just two or three years ago, us four screw-ups, other people who live around here, even everyday things like jobs. And even though all this craziness happened, they found their way back to each other.

"In 1945, when I was eleven or twelve, the war ended. It left a lot of destruction in its wake, people and cities and bombs and every single thing that the Germans destroyed. My dad was really upset because of all our family who had died. My Mémé and Pépé had died, and my aunts and uncles and cousins, and we didn't know about Kankri, because he was at university and couldn't get home. My father, German by birth but raised in here France, also had an uncle, my Oncle Hans, who fought against us. And that hurt us too, because we were fighting my family, even though they were in the wrong.

"On May 1st, 1945, we found out that my Tante Josephine had died. My dad's little sister. I was close to my aunt, and my dad was too. So it was really hard for us when she died. That was the first day my dad met Diana. I remember that she knocked on the door with a box of Madelenes. My dad was very grateful to my now stepmom for caring enough to bake cookies. She sat with him and talked. Then I left because my friend Sollux told me to go jump in a lake, but that's unimportant."

"Thanks for making me sound like a bad friend!" Sollux shouted.

"You _are_ a bad friend!" Karkat shouted back. "Either way, you're probably wondering where I'm going with this, and I am too, because apparently there was some miscommunication on the whole, 'Telling Karkat what the hel—heck he's doing at his dad's wedding,' front. Anyways, moving on, I think it's it really nice that even though a lot of shi—weird stuff goes on in my family and with the war and no one's perfect, they still fell in love and mutually put up with each other's rather obnoxious children. Especially me. So, yeah. Love is blind and it's crazy and I'm glad that they're happy."

He climbed off the stage while the people clapped and collapsed onto the bench where Sollux was sitting. "Champagne?" Sollux asked.

"I hate you, I hate your brother, I hate your dad, I hate your mom, I hate your brother's ex-girlfriend, I hate your brother's ex-girlfriend's boyfriend…"

"That's your brother," Sollux pointed out.

"I know," Karkat said. "I hate your best friend…"

"That's you," Sollux interjected again.

"Yeah, I know," Karkat said. "I hate your family cat…"

"We don't have a cat," Sollux said.

"You do now."

"What, just because you hate it?"

"Yes. As soon as you hate something, it exists. And that's why I hate your goldfish."

"You are insane," Sollux said.

"Thank you. As I was saying, I hate your Tante Camille, I hate your family cow, I hate your girlfriend…" Karkat ranted. Aradia walked by.

"You hate me?" she asked, sounding jokingly offended and innocent.

"No, I'm just pissed at Sollux. Because I DON'T WANT FUCKING CHAMPAGNE!"

"All you had to say was no," she said. There was a silence. "Soda?"

"You two should be the couple that gives every single fucking person fucking soda!"

"You might want to go home. You seem a bit angry," Sollux commented.

"Do I, Sollux? Do I?" Karkat yelled.

"Just a bit," Aradia said. "Come on, you can't stay here in this state."

"What state?" Karkat yelled.

"Completely flipped out and, if I'm not mistaken, a bit tipsy," she clarified, surveying the four empty glasses next to him.

"All I had was a couple glasses of wine!"

"How many is a couple?"

"I dunno, three or so?"

"No wonder you sounded so shitty onstage," Sollux broke in.

"Go find someone single to take you home. All the couples are dancing." Aradia rolled her eyes.

"Fine. Whatever. I can walk myself home. I am NOT drunk."

"Okay," Aradia said doubtfully. "Come on, Sollux, let's go dance."

Karkat walked slowly home. He was crying about as hard as a drunk person who had just had his heart broken. He probably looked like a complete mess, he knew. He just plodded home and cried.

When he finally arrived at his own house, he slammed the door, marched to the room he shared with Kankri, and fell face-first onto his bed. He felt like shit. He'd fucked up everything. He was so completely, utterly worthless. Everything had gone wrong. With that fucking speech, with his brother, with Terezi, every single fucking thing. He couldn't stop the tears that cascaded down his face. He was such a failure.

When his brother came home at about three AM, he was drunk as hell. "Hey, Karkat," Kankri said, slurring badly. He had a wine glass in one hand and his other arm was around Latula, who was giggling and missing a shoe. She was stumbling, because she'd been wearing heels. Presuming that he didn't want to be in the room, or even in the house, when whatever was going to happen between Kankri and Latula happened, Karkat said, "I'm going to spend the night at Sollux's, shall I? Tell Dad for me."

"Okay, man," Kankri slurred.

"You have fun," Latula added with a hiccup and a giggle, equally drunk.

Karkat left without even grabbing his toothbrush.

He arrived at Sollux's house and knocked on the door, feeling slightly hopeless and very nauseous. Damn champagne and wine. Sometimes, he really hated Sollux. But Sollux opened the door and said, "So you saw Kankri and Latula?"

Karkat nodded.

"You can sleep on the couch," Sollux said. "Unless you want to sleep in the deep dark pit of Mituna's old room."

"Fuck no."

"Then couch," Sollux said, tossing Karkat a blanket.

"Sleep good," Karkat said, exhausted.

"It's sleep well, numbnuts," Sollux corrected obnoxiously.

"SLEEP WELL YOU UNAPPRECIATIVE FUCK."

Sollux rolled his eyes and walked back to his own room. Karkat fell asleep on the couch.

When he came back home the next day, he saw a very despairing-looking Kankri lying on his bed.

"Um…Kankri?"

There was a vague mumble that might have been, "Yes, Karkat?"

"Where is your shirt?"

"I think Latula has it."

"More important, where are your pants?"

Kankri sat up halfway, looked around, and said, "I don't know."

"Sleep well?" Karkat asked.

"Oh, shut up," Kankri said, choking out a strange dry sob and falling back on his bed, his hands over his face. "Last night may well have ruined my whole life."

"Oh, trust me, it did," Karkat said dryly.

"I cannot even _forget _most of that," Kankri said.

"It was actually quite hilarious."

"Please tell me you have a truly terrible memory."

"Unfortunately, I have a very good one."

"What do you remember?"

"Well, you came in with Latula and you were both drunk and giggling and hiccupping and she was missing a shoe and you didn't have your jacket and your tie was all fucked up. It was all untied and hanging around your neck like you were some drunk poser, which you were at the time."

Kankri groaned.

"She was stroking your hair and stuff and then you two sat on your bed and were all fucking making out so I went to Sollux's."

"Oh dang it."

"It's really obvious what happened. Dad's going to kill you."

"Fuck," Kankri swore.

Latula stumbled in the door at quarter past ten. "What happened?" she asked.

Terezi patted the couch next to her chair. "You were drunk as hell."

"No shit," Latula groaned. "I don't remember it too well."

"Latula," Terezi began.

"Yes, Terezi?" Latula asked.

"Whose shirt are you wearing?"

"Kankri's. I hope." Latula paused and glanced at the shirt. "I really hope so. Oh shit, what if it isn't? I am so fucked."

"Yes, yes you are."

"Shut the fuck up. Whatever. At least it's his shirt. What even happened?"

"Well, last I saw you, you were with Kankri and missing a shoe. He had his arm around you and you two were all drunk and giggly and weird and you were sort of stroking his hair and macking on his face. It was really weird and sorta creepy. And then you two walked out, sort of in the direction of Kankri's house."

Latula groaned and fell backwards, covering her face with her hands. "Now I remember it. Shit, Kankri's dad is going to kill him and it's all my fault."

"I would ask for details, but that would be rude."

"Just ask Karkat."

At the words, Terezi was instantly incensed. "Don't even mention that fucking bastard to me!" she shouted.

"Did he get drunk and some weird shit happened?"

"He wasn't even drunk," Terezi said, sounding heartbroken. She crossed her arms at the wrists on a table and rested her chin on her hands.

"That's bad," Latula said.

"No shit," Terezi said, moving her head so her forehead was on her hands, hiding her face.

"Give it a few days and he'll probably come around and apologize. He's totally in luuuurrrrrve with you."

"What would you know about guys fucking up?" Terezi asked, looking up.

"One word: Kankri."

"Point taken," Terezi said, hiding her face again.

Latula groaned again, clutching her head.

"Want a glass of water, big sis?"

"Yeah, that would be good."

Karkat and Kankri and their dad were supposed to move that day. But Kankri was so hung over that he was no help.

"Karkat," Kankri began, just before their dad came home.

"What now, drunkie?"

"If you ever find some girl who is willing to marry you…"

"Yes?"

"Don't invite me to the wedding."

"Wasn't planning on it."

Just then, the front door opened and their dad walked in. They hadn't planned to pack until the last minute, because they didn't have all that much, money or possessions. They each threw their stuff into an overlarge cardboard box and carried all the boxes to the door, where Nepeta's mom was waiting with a borrowed car. There was no practical use for a car, because everything anyone needed was within walking and/or biking range, so they'd borrowed Feferi's mom's car.

Karkat felt half-dead as he loaded the car. It had been a rough night. He felt three-quarters dead as he unloaded the car again at Nepeta's house.

"We have three rooms, so Nepeta and Meulin can share and you two can each have your own room," Mrs. Leijon (Mrs. Vantas? _Maman_? Diana?) said.

"Sounds lovely, dear," Karkat's dad said, kissing Diana. "Let's unpack."

Diana gave Nepeta a look. "Okay, _Maman_. I'll help," Nepeta said. She took a box and dragged it to a room. "This weighs a ton," she said. Karkat followed her. "I got it, that's my box," he said.

"Take it," she said. "I'd rather be sleeping."

"Your whole family is fucking nocturnal or some shit," Karkat muttered under his breath.

He dropped the box in the first room on the right. "Need help?" she asked, sounding reluctant.

"Yeah, sure," he agreed. He wasn't really hung over, but he felt pretty shitty anyway.

She picked up one thing, a stuffed crab. "Uh…what's this?" she asked, holding the crab by one claw.

He snatched the stuffed crab out of her hand, blushing furiously. "Nothing," he said. "I meant to give it away a long time ago. You know, I think I've got the rest of this."

She rolled her eyes and said, "If you're sure." He breathed a sigh of relief.

Nepeta was sitting in her room with a book and a notebook when Karkat knocked on the door. "_Qu'est-ce que c'est_?" she called. "What is it?"

Karkat walked in. "I need some advice," he admitted.

She put down her book. It was about Terezi, she was sure. "Just apologize to her," she said.

"How the fuck did you figure it out?" he asked, looking stunned.

"Never mind that. Really, just go knock on her door and apologize. It seems impossible, I know. But she's had some time to cool off and her sister's probably been advising her. I mean, it is pretty obvious how much you like her."

"Please tell me you mean obvious to fucking mind-readers like you."

"No, everyone knows you're totally in love with her. But I don't think anyone else knows you guys fought, except Sollux and Aradia of course."

"And how did you know that?"

"Sollux is your best friend and Aradia is really smart."

"I hate smart people."

"You hate your girlfriend then."

"Not what I fucking meant!"

"Calm down, I was messing with you. Just go apologize. Really. Good luck," Nepeta persisted. She was sure that unless he screwed this up, too, Terezi wouldn't be mad. It was pretty obvious, to her anyways.

She smiled involuntarily, glad that she was over him. After three years liking him, she was finally over him. There was a joy in it, almost as much as the joy when she saw him in the halls at school when she liked him. But for the life of her, there was no way she would ever tell him, or let him see a page of her damn poetry that she kept meaning to burn or something.

"Okay, so you've written a lot of poetry before, right?" Karkat asked.

"Yes…" Nepeta answered slowly. She didn't like where this was going.

"What do you do with it when you're done writing?"

"Uh…mostly hide it and hope no one ever reads it."

"Where do you keep all this apparently shitty poetry?"

"The deep dark pit of this notebook," she said, tossing it onto the bed next to her with a look of disgust. "I should burn that damned thing."

"Can I read some of it?"

Nepeta's eyes widened in the mix of embarrassment and self-consciousness she was feeling. She shook her head violently. "Hey Meulin!" she called. "Can we have a fire tonight? There's some stuff I'd like to burn."

"What?" Meulin shouted, walking over to Nepeta's room. Nepeta signed, "Can we have a fire? I want to burn my notebook."

Meulin nodded knowingly and signed, "I'll burn mine too."

"Thanks, big sis," Nepeta signed.

Meulin smiled and walked back to the living room.

"Guess not," Karkat said sarcastically. "I just need to get my grades up in the fucking poetry unit, jeez. I'm not trying to be a creep."

"Yeah, well, go read someone else's poetry. No one gets to read mine."

"What the hell do you write poetry about that I can't read it?"

"Nothing important. Now get out of my room."

Kankri, who was passing, said, "The sibling rivalry. It starts."

Nepeta closed the door when Karkat left and started to copy her best poems into a second notebook. In code. Backwards.

They had a fire that night. Sigmund and Nepeta's mom had left for their honeymoon, which left Kankri and Meulin in charge.

"What did you use to start this fire, anyways?" Kankri asked.

"My poetry," Nepeta answered, staring at the ashes of her notebook pages.

"It can't have been that bad," Kankri said.

"It wasn't bad poetry, per say, more embarrassing," Nepeta said awkwardly.

"About what?" Kankri asked.

"Nothing," Nepeta said, a bit too quickly. She blushed scarlet and signed, "Why is he asking so many questions?"

Meulin signed back, "He knows sign language."

Nepeta threw up her hands in frustration.

"If it was your poetry, you'd burn it at this point, too!" Meulin shouted. "I've read it."

"I wouldn't burn my poetry," Karkat said. "If I had any."

"Trust me, if it was yours, you would," Nepeta insisted, throwing another crumpled page into the fire.

"Okay, it can't be that bad," Karkat said. He picked up a sheet of paper from the ground, one of the last few Nepeta was throwing into the fire. He uncrumpled it. "If I ever told you—" he read aloud, before Nepeta snatched the paper out of his hand and threw it into the fire. She grabbed her notebook, which still had some pages that she hadn't torn out, and started hitting him with it. "You—do—NOT—read—my—fucking—poetry!" she yelled.

"Calm the fuck down!" he shouted back, throwing up his arms to stop her hitting him. "What the hell is up with you?"

She shook her head. "Just don't come NEAR my notebook," she reiterated. "I will hurt you."

"Jeez, fine," he said.

Meulin rolled her eyes and signed, "Boys. The stupidest creatures to walk the Earth."

"No kidding," Nepeta signed back. "Marshmallows?"

"Definitely," Meulin signed, standing up to get the marshmallows.

"What the fuck just happened?" Karkat asked.

"I had a conversation with my sister," Nepeta answered.

There was a long silence, but not an uncomfortable one.

"Kankri?" Karkat said.

"Yes, Karkat?"

"You know I hate you, right?"

"I hate you too."

"Can't you feel the brotherly love?" Nepeta asked sarcastically.

"Since when are you sarcastic?" Karkat said, surprised.

"Since you became family."

"Like I need more fucking sarcastic people in my life."

Nepeta rolled her eyes but dropped it, instead opting to take and eat a marshmallow.

The next day was very sunny, to the point where Karkat was squinting in the sunlight. He took a deep breath. He gathered all his courage and knocked on the door. Latula opened it. "Awww," she said. "TEREZI!"

"WHAT?" came a vague call from upstairs.

"IT'S YOUR LOVER!" Latula answered.

"COMING!" Terezi shouted. Karkat heard someone walking heavily down steps.

"What?" she asked belligerently, crossing her arms. Something in her tone reminded Karkat of his own tone of voice when he'd been mocking Kankri after the wedding: anger hiding hurt.

"I—uh, I just wanted to say, uh, sorry," he stumbled. "I'm sorry."

She suddenly hugged him. "Thanks," she said. "It's okay."

He felt a tear drip on his shoulder. "Why are you crying?" he asked, mystified. "I just apologized."

"Well, it's like…it's sorta complicated."

"Can you try to explain?"

"I dunno, it's just…everything."

"It's not like I insulted you. I just insulted your sister. Why are you so upset about this?"

"She's my sister! It's like, she's my family and she's important to me."

"It's not like I called you a poser or a slut, bitch!" he shouted.

"You moron! My sister is important to me, so I get mad when you insult her!"

"Well now I've gone and insulted you and you don't even fucking care!"

"Oh I care all right! You are such an insecure bitch! Do you have half a brain in that empty head of yours?"

"You're a slut! You were dating Dave and he cheated on you! He only dated you because we all know you're a whore like your sister!"

"Yeah? Gamzee's gone out with more girls than you! Equius has gone out with more girls than you! You can barely get a single girl to get within three feet of you!"

"Do you think I care? It's not like you can do any better!"

"I thought I was a slut?"

"No, you're a coin!"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"You're two-faced, worthless, and in everyone's pants!"

"You'd like that, you piece of shit! Get out of my house!"

"Get out of my fucking life!"

She slammed the door in his face. He thought he heard a sob.

He heard feet pounding. Latula opened the door. "I hope you're fucking happy! Are you really that spineless and immature and insecure and bitchy? She actually liked you! Fuck you!" She slapped him across the face and slammed the door in his face…again. Karkat stared at the house for a second, then turned and plodded to Sollux's house, just across the street.

"Dude," Sollux said. He was standing just inside the door. "You fucked up pretty bad. That was worse than the first time."

Karkat nodded. He sat on the couch and started to cry, huge, messy sobs. He covered his face with his hands as tears leaked through his fingers and his shoulders convulsed. He felt Sollux sit down next to him and patted his back in a sort of half-hug, some sort of consolation. "Yeah, I know, man. It's rough."

"What the fuck did I do wrong?" Karkat asked hopelessly.

"Yelling at her doesn't really help. In fact, it was sort of terrifying. I could hear you from my house."

"I pretty much figured _that_ out, fucknut. Can you tell me what I actually fucked up?"

"I dunno, man. I dunno."

They sat in silence for several long minutes while Karkat tried to stop crying and Sollux did a pathetic job of comforting him.

"Don't you have a friend who's a girl you can ask?" Sollux asked.

"Out of the girls we know…Aradia, no way. Rose would psychoanalyze me with insecurity or some shit. Jade is too fucking perky, and so is Feferi. No way in hell would I ever ask Vriska for advice. Terezi…well…I don't think—" He choked on yet another sob. When he could speak again, he continued. "That leaves Kanaya and Nepeta."

"You could try talking to Kanaya. She's all motherly and everything. She might have some idea what to do."

"Why does it always turn out that I have to ask someone else for advice?"

"Because you suck at talking to girls?"

"Oh shut up. You're not any better."

"Well, at least I don't scream at my girlfriend."

"Fine. But after my face is less red and fucked-up looking," Karkat agreed.

Later, when Karkat had washed his face and put on a coat that covered his face, he resignedly trudged to the café where Kanaya and Rose were always hanging out. He forgot it was Sunday, the day most everyone went to the lake. Of course no one was at the café. Of course. Just when he actually was going to try to get help for once is his miserable existence, everyone went to the damn lake.

Perfect.

Well, if he couldn't find anyone, maybe he could just…put this whole deal off for a while. At least, until he gathered the courage to face this clusterfuck again.

Rose looked around carefully. No one else was around. Kanaya was supposed to meet her at the lake, at the gray rock specifically. Everyone else had left for the field. Not a single other person knew about the relationship between her and Kanaya. It wasn't the sort of thing you could parade around without worrying about someone…well. Burning you at the stake or something.

"Rose?" Kanaya called softly. "Rose?"

"I'm here," Rose said, hugging her girlfriend. "Where I've always been."

"It is so nice to see you," Kanaya said. "You know how it can be during the school year."

"It's always the same around here," Rose commiserated. "No one truly realizes it."

"On that topic…I have some unfortunate news," Kanaya began. "My mother has informed me that she would like me to have a debut and that she would like me to be married by the time I am twenty-two."

"We always knew this couldn't last."

"I didn't want it to end because you have to be married."

"I didn't either, but I have no choice. My mother has always been very clear that a woman's role in society is as a mother and a wife, not…"

"Mine as well. I am so sorry, Kanaya."

"It's not until I am eighteen, you know."

"We've still got three more years."

"Let's make the most of it, then."

Rose kissed Kanaya as hard as she could, pressing her mouth to her girlfriend's as if they'd never see each other again. Which was half-true. If Kanaya's mother planned to have her daughter debuted and married by the time she was twenty-two that gave them three more years to stay together this way.

Unless of course someone found out.

Rose refused to consider the possibility. Her girlfriend and her were each other's dirty little secrets. They'd been careful. No one had found out so far and no one would, so long as they were very, very careful.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: This chapter is comparatively short because I split the previous chapter, so sorry about that. The next chapter should be finished soon, I hope. **_**Chacuterie **_**is a sort of deli, **_**boulangerie **_**is a bakery, and **_**laurier**_** trees are just a type of trees that grow in the south of France. If anything needs to be translated or explained better, just leave a comment or review. **

Chapter 4: A Guide To Making It Up As You Go Along

It was the seventh or eighth day since they'd moved to the Leijon's family's house. Karkat was sitting at one of the outdoor tables at the café with his stepsister. He'd never get used to that. Nepeta was his stepsister. That was weird as fuck.

"You really need to do something about this," Nepeta said to him. "All you've been doing for days is mope around the house. Just apologize to her. For both fights."

"I don't know how! I want to do something all fucking nice and sentimental and fucking romantic but I don't know shit about romance!" Karkat yelled.

"Alright, let's start with what you know about Terezi," Nepeta said.

"Where is this going?"

"You need to get her a present. What's her favorite color?"

"Red. Fire motherfucking red."

"I'm sorry to sound my overbearing stepfather, but language, Karkat."

"Fine, fine, whatever."

"What's her favorite animal?" Nepeta asked.

"Dragons."

She snapped her fingers. "Red snapdragons!" she said. "They smell nice, they're red, and they're named after dragons."

"Really, I didn't get that from the fucking name."

She gave him a look. _I can finally look at him and not feel anything_, she thought. _I can't believe how nice this is_. "You can give her a bouquet of snapdragons." She scribbled on her notepad.

"Do you ever stop fucking writing in that thing?"

"I have trouble keeping track of things."

There was a pause in which Karkat sulked and Nepeta scribbled. "Your handwriting sucks," he commented.

"And yours doesn't?" she quipped. "Anyways, you should write her a poem or a song."

"There is no way in hell I could ever write a song."

"Write her a sonnet."

"Why a sonnet?"

"It's the most romantic."

"I cannot write fucking poetry."

"That's why I'm here. To help," she pointed out. "Okay, so what do you like about her? Be specific."

"She's pretty."

Nepeta facepalmed. "That is not the best thing you could say to win a girl back."

"Why?" he asked in confusion.

"Give it a minute."

He stared at her.

"She'll think you only like her for her looks."

"Oh."

"Moving on. So, she's pretty? What about her is pretty?"

"Uh, her eyes."

"What about her eyes?"

"Um…they're a really nice shade of teal."

"Okay, teal eyes. I can work with that."

"How are you so good at writing sonnets?"

She blushed. "It's sort of a long story." _One I can never tell you_, she thought.

"What else can I say?" he asked.

"Hm…where did you have your first kiss?" she asked, tapping her pencil against her chin.

"The fields," he answered, blushing a violent red.

"Can you describe the details surrounding your first kiss?"

He gave her a completely freaked-out look.

"I mean, what was the field like?"

"Flowers."

She wrote another line. "Any strong emotions?"

"Why are you asking me these really personal questions?"

"Girls love it when you remember stuff like the first kiss."

"Okay then, whatever. There were roses and grass and shit over her face and it was a really clear night and I was happy."

"Anything else?"

"Fuck NO."

"Okay, that's good enough. I can figure it out from there."

"It was really nice," he muttered. "If that helps."

"Aw, that's so adorable!" she squealed.

"Shut the fuck up."

"Whatever. It works. And a place you like to hang out?"

"The field?"

"That is so freaking adorable!"

"Seriously. Shut. The. Fuck. Up."

"Good. I can work with this," she said. She wrote another line of the poem down, then looked up. "Something you like to do with her, and for goodness' sakes, _don't_ say make out," she said, rolling her eyes.

"I wasn't going to. I'm not Eridan, jeez. Has anyone actually said that to you?"

"You could not believe the people who ask me to write poems."

"Eridan?"

"Mm-hmm." Nepeta rested her chin on her hands. "Alright, I need one more thing, for the couplet at the end, something really sweet." When he said nothing, she added, "I'm asking you for help here."

"Uh…hell if I know. I suck at poems. I always get fucking threes and fours in French class."

"Wow, that is impressively bad," she said.

"You sound like Sollux."

"It's a sibling thing. I no longer feel like I have to be nice to you."

"Lovely."

"Anyways. Something you once did, maybe?"

"We went stargazing."

"That is so cute!"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" he shouted.

She rolled her eyes. "Okay, stargazing. That is really good. Nothing rhymes with "gazing" but it doesn't have to end the line, so it's okay. Just one more thing. Come on. Something you like about her."

"She's really true to herself?"

"Perfect! That is so adorable!" she exclaimed.

"WILL YOU FUKCING STOP SAYING THAT?" he exploded.

"So-rry," she said sarcastically, rolling her eyes.

"Can I take the notebook?"

She blushed a bright shade of tomato-red. "No. But I'll tear out the page…hold on." She turned to the other side of the page and started scribbling over whatever was there with a pencil. She examined both sides carefully again, then ripped out the page. "Copy it or something, and don't read the back."

"Why not?"

"Just don't."

And that was how Karkat came up with the idea for the picnic.

"Mom! I'm going to the lake!" Nepeta called.

"With who?" her mom asked.

"Take a damn guess, woman!" Karkat shouted.

"Don't say that to my mom!" Nepeta yelled back. "She's your mom, too!"

"Not biologically!" Kankri called from downstairs.

There was a thump that sounded like a large book hitting someone's head.

"Ouch!" Kankri shouted involuntarily when the dictionary hit his head. "That was uncalled for, Meulin."

"But nice shot," Karkat said, giving Meulin a thumbs-up.

There was the sound of slap.

"That was fucking uncalled for, you moron of a brother," Karkat said, rubbing the spot on his left cheek where Kankri had slapped him.

"That's what happens when you wake me up before nine AM!" Meulin shouted.

"Jeez, you sleep later than Latula," Kankri muttered, but everyone heard.

"Well, you would know," Karkat shot back.

Kankri blushed tomato-red.

"What did you say?" his dad asked.

"Nothing!" Kankri shouted, trying not to sound desperate or panicky. Karkat rolled his eyes and made a ridiculous kissy-face and a hand heart to taunt his brother.

"Go to hell, Karkat!" Kankri yelled.

"I'll meet you there!" Karkat shot back.

"Boys, language!" their dad shouted.

Nepeta signed something at Meulin, who nodded in agreement and signed something else back.

"Excuse me?" Kankri asked indignantly. "That's insulting."

"What the hell just happened?" Karkat asked in confusion, the only one in the family who didn't know sign language.

"Alright, we're going now," Nepeta said, grabbing Karkat's arm and dragging him out of the house. Just before she closed the door, she heard Meulin shout, "You are so rude!" Presumably in reaction to something Kankri signed.

She also saw her mother rest her head in her hands and shake her head.

They walked to the lake, where they would set up the picnic.

"Okay, you have to teach me sign language," Karkat said to Nepeta.

She sighed deeply. "Fine," she conceded. "This is the sign for 'sister.'" She did a hand motion so fast that Karkat didn't get it at all.

"What?" he asked.

She repeated the sign, but slower. "It's really not that hard," she said. She'd learned sign language relatively quickly.

He awkwardly copied her.

"You suck at sign language," she sighed.

"I'm fucking trying!" he said in frustration. "Sign language is fucking hard."

"One more time," she said impatiently. She repeated the sign for "sister" one more time.

"Okay, I think I got it," he said, trying one more time.

"Good. Now, 'brother,'" she continued.

"What about, you know, verbs and stuff?" he asked.

"Just learn the basics first. Trust me on this one."

"What about the alphabet?"

"Well, this is 'a,'" she said, holding up a fist with her thumb to the side.

"Okay. 'A.' I got this," he said, copying the letter.

"Now, 'b,'" Nepeta continued, holding up four fingers with her thumb tucked in.

Karkat practiced the alphabet until they arrived at the lake. He was getting better at the letters, although he knew that he still had a lot to learn. "Why does your sister have to be damn deaf?" Karkat asked.

"A bomb landed next to her and blew out her hearing. Her ears were bleeding and she was in tears. I don't think it was a choice," Nepeta said, sounding insulted.

"Well, so-rry," Karkat said sarcastically. "I'm so terribly fucking sorry for not knowing your sister's tragic story."

"What is it with you and insulting people's families?" Nepeta asked. "Not everyone hates their brother like you do. Anyways, don't you know he cares about you a lot?"

"Who?" Karkat asked, confused.

"Kankri. Your _brother_. He's very protective of you, am I right? And so you think he doesn't trust you. You think he doesn't think you can do anything on your own. But it's because he cares about you, a lot. He wants to protect you and keep you safe. I mean, it's obvious. You just hate him because you don't know that," she explained.

"How the hell do you figure this shit out?"

"Remember the day you came home from work at midnight? He asked you if you were okay, and if someone had hurt you, and if something was wrong. He acted just like my mom the day I got lost on my way home from school and when I came home she shook me and yelled at me and then she hugged me like she was never going to let go. And if anyone loves me, it's my mother. Don't you see? You almost act like that around Terezi. Whenever she's about to do something crazy, you try to stop her. When she fell out of the window, you caught her. Your brother cares about you a lot."

"I always though he hated me. He's always telling me to go away and shit."

"Yeah, like you aren't? You're siblings, _brothers_. You'll disagree sometimes, and goodness knows you don't always want to be around each other. But he cares about you; you just don't see it. The same way Meulin cares about me, Rufioh cares about Tavros, Latula cares about Terezi, even Dave's brother cares about him."

"Well ain't that damn lovely."

"Just come on. If you want my help setting up a picnic, please stop making me explain very basic family relationships to you."

"I didn't ask you too."

"I'm not about to let you go on thinking your brother hates you."

"And why not?"

"You can't just spend your whole life believing that you're unloved."

"But it's true." Karkat kicked a pebble, looking down dejectedly and shoving his hands into his pockets.

"Terezi loves you," Nepeta pointed out. "Your brother. Your dad. My mom. You are loved, you just don't see it. Sometimes I think you're refusing to see it. But you just go around all the time, looking so grumpy, because you don't think you're loved."

The rest of the walk was silent.

Setting up the picnic for Terezi, all was silent.

Nepeta was silent as she left for home.

Karkat felt himself shaking badly as Terezi crashed through the grasses and towards the field. What if this whole crazy romantic gesture didn't work and she was still pissed off at him? He nearly broke one of the Coca-Cola bottles while he waited because he was so damn nervous.

She reached the field and her eyes locked on him immediately. Or, he guess they did. Her head snapped to the right, seeing him sitting on the tablecloth his dad shoved to the back of every linens cabinet because it was their mother's favorite. "Karkles?" she asked, and for once she sounded timid.

"Uh…hi," he said. "I…uh…"

"You set up a picnic," she stated. "That's…very nice of you."

"Thanks," he said, and he felt his entire face heat up by at least twenty degrees. "I…I got you flowers."

"Thanks," she said shyly, taking the vibrant red bouquet and blushing a vibrant crimson. "Okay. We need to talk."

"Yeah," he said. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't've said that stuff about your sister. I was just mad at my brother so I guess I said some stuff in the heat of the moment. And I really, really should not have said that mean stuff to you. Sorry."

"It's okay. Well…I'm sorry for overreacting. I sorta flipped my shit over this when I shouldn't have. I freaked out way too much to that. I mean, I think it was okay to be upset, but I way overreacted. So, uh, sorry."

"It's okay. So. Uh. I've set up this nice picnic here, want to eat it?"

"Of course," she said. "As long as there's _confiture des fraises_, strawberry jelly."

"OH! Um, I think I maybe sort of forgot that…"

"I'm kidding, stupid. Thought you'd have caught on by now."

"Oh."

"You had this all planned out, didn't you?" Terezi asked teasingly,

"Uh…yeah," he admitted.

"It's alright. Want to know a secret?" He nodded. She leaned in closer and whispered, "I did too." She kissed him quickly and reached for a croissant, leaving him stunned and a little woozy.

She'd never admit it, but she felt the same way.

He took a few small glass jars of jelly out of the picnic basket. "I love my stepsisters," he said suddenly.

"Why?"

"They packed the picnic because I was busy…uh…trying to find the flower shop."

"So your stepsisters had to plan out your nice romantic gesture for you?"

"Shut up!"

"No, don't worry. I…I got my sister to help me come up with something."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"What?"

"Uh…just…something."

"Really, what is it?"

"Okay…so you know how you said you love those strawberry candies?"

"Yeah."

"And they're getting hard to find?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I got you some." She held out her hand and she was holding at least twenty of those delicious strawberry candies that he absolutely loved. "It's not much," she admitted, and the shyness in her voice made his insides turn to Jello. "But I thought you'd like them."

"Thanks," he said, his face heating up another twenty degrees. "Want to…split them?" he asked, knowing that they were her favorite, too.

"I guess," she replied, taking a couple and unwrapping them. "This is…nice. I love it out here."

"Been the same since we found it when I was eight. When'd you move here?"

"!938. From Avignon."

"Was it nice there?"

"It was beautiful. We went to the theater festival every year, my mom and my dad and Latula and I. We used to see a couple plays with my aunt Mizune in them, because she came form here to Avignon for the festival every year. The theater festival was…it was the most fun I ever had. I'd go around with my friends on my own a lot, and once we saw this guy walking around with nothing on, just holding up a box! And they had the best lavender candies. I'd buy a jar and eat a couple every day for a few months. I loved it there."

"Ever get homesick for it?"

"All the time. But it's nice here. And my aunt, since she gave up part-time acting to be a lawyer full-time, she's great. Lets Latula and I do our own thing and stuff. What about you? You've lived here your whole life. What was it like when you were a kid?"

"Same as it is now. Same _laurier_ trees, same ancient stone church the priest comes to once a month or so, same old tiny _boulangerie _and _chacuterie_ and everything. The hotel used to be a lot smaller. You know how there's four pools? Used to just one, and only a few rooms. Feferi's mom's been buying up more houses to convert to rooms since. But, you know, the wine co-op and the streets and the pump and that one super-nice house where Feferi's family lives, it's mostly been the same as far back as I can remember.

"I wish I could get out of here. Move to Paris. Live somewhere nice with a view of the Eiffel Tower. You know. Pass the _bac_, go to college, get a job in entertainment or sociology. But here I am, stuck in the middle of nowhere with some ancient Roman ruins, an aqueduct, and not much else. We can't afford to go to Nîmes or anything on the weekends or during summer."

"It's not so bad. Big cities are overrated."

"You already said you're sometimes homesick for Avignon."

"Yeah, cuz I grew up there!"

"I grew up here and I'm sick of it."

"I'm not."

"Yeah right."

She looked defeated as she said, "Alright, fine. I've always wanted to live in Paris. You know the _Palais du Justice_? I'd live near there, right by the Seine."

"That sounds fucking perfect. Aradia once said there's this great pizza place there, right near this hotel called Citadines."

"How long did Aradia live in Paris?"

"Dunno. She moved here in 1940. Said she wanted to go back to Paris as soon as she could."

"Is it just me, or do all of us want to go to Paris?"

"It's not just you. All sixteen of us. But the other people in this town, well, some want to stay here, some want to stay near here, and some want to go to Avignon or Nîmes or Arles. But all sixteen of us…Paris is the place for me. A proper _city_. A big one."

"You're a dreamer."

"Well, so-rry."

"No, it's a good thing. Really. It's good to dream."

"What's your dream?"

"I want to go to law school. Be a lawyer. Like I said, _Palais du Justice_. I know there's not a lot of woman lawyers, but I don't care. I'm going to be a lawyer like my aunt."

"What about Latula?"

"She's going to be a housewife. You know how Kankri got into _grande êcole_, so he's guaranteed a good job and shit. So he'll work and she'll be a mother, I guess. She's never really had a dream."

"I can't imagine not having somewhere you wanted to go in your life."

"That's my sister for you. Live in the moment, she says. She wants to have a couple kids, but she doesn't have any other plans. She doesn't think I'm crazy or anything, but you know her. She's not like me or my aunt. She's sort of like my dad. He was always live-in-the-moment. My mom loved that about him. Btu I like plans. Logical, thought-out plans. Something solid, you know? I don't like the sort of fluid plans most people have."

"My plans suck. I'm never going to do well enough to get into an art school. And there's no way in hell I could get into a sociology school."

"You get mostly, like, 13's on stuff. How is that not good enough?"

"You've got fucking 15's on everything. You're guaranteed a spot in law school."

"Thanks."

"Thing is…I want to be in entertainment, film or something, but…it's my dad. He thinks that film is…I dunno, ruining the minds of the next generation or some shit. So he doesn't really approve. He wanted Kankri to be fucking priest…it's the only time I can remember Kankri not listening to my dad. He gave up being a priest to be with Latula."

"I don't think you should listen to your dad. Follow your dreams."

"I…okay. It's just that…when I was little, right after my mom died. My dad…used to hit us sometimes. When we fucked up. Lasted about a month or two. It really wasn't bad, not like a lot of parents around here. But it was terrifying, because my dad was super pacifist and shit. And the only time I got it was when I snuck out to see a movie. Usually it was Kankri, cuz his grades dropped really badly right around then. I just…I just want my dad to be proud of me."

"I'm…I'm sorry."

"Yeah."

They sat quietly picking apart croissants and slowly eating _brioches avec chocolat_, sweet bread with chocolate. The jams Meulin or Nepeta had picked were delicious and Karkat was suddenly really glad that he had stepsisters. Sometimes, when he wasn't holding something in his hand or chewing, she would kiss him and he would melt and grow and feel like laughing aloud, something he never did, all at the same time. At least it was getting more normal for him and less…_oh bloody hell shit shit fuck what do I do wow this feels so fucking perfect but am I doing this right jeez she is really pretty_…and so on and so on.

His train of thought could be seriously fucking weird sometimes.

"It must be close to…look at the sun. Maybe…three or so?" Terezi guessed.

"We should be getting home."

"Yeah. You take the basket?"

"Fine."

Terezi held his free hand as they walked home, and his stomach did some seriously complicated gymnastics as she squeezed his hand and kissed him goodbye.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Thanks for reading this whoever actually is reading this! Please leave comments/reviews so I can make this better. Much credit to my best friend slytherinpirate (tumblr) for the first part Truth-or-Dare scene (which was his idea). **

Chapter 5: How Can So Many Things Go Wrong in One Week?

Sollux was sitting in the office on Thursday, sorting through the piles and piles of paper and doing calculations. Aradia knocked on the door and entered without waiting for him to reply. She wrapped her arms around his neck and rested her chin on his shoulder.

"I am death," he said, flopping backwards so her face was right above his. She sat next to him and patted his back. "Okay," she said cheerily.

"You're okay with that?"

"I'm death too. I just spent nine hours teaching people to dance and then walked here."

"Why here and not home?"

"Because you're here and you're nice."

"I hate you."

"Oh, shut up, you love me," she teased, kissing his nose lightly. He laughed. "Oh, alright, I'm almost done anyways. But how am I supposed to bike you home?" Sollux asked.

"I can ride on your handlebars. I'm a bit shorter than you."

"We both look like we grew a foot overnight."

"Yeah, but I'm still a bit shorter. Please? I'm half-dead here."

"But I am death."

"Then it shouldn't be a problem, Mr. Grim Reaper. Just get me home. You're probably losing water weight in this room. Soon you'll be skin and bones."

"Like you aren't?"

"I have muscle from dance."

"Fine."

"You can just go to your house, I can walk from there."

He stacked the remaining papers, put away his pencil, and stood up. He was about two inches taller than her. He took her hand and walked outside with her, laughing.

He unlocked his bike and swung his leg over it, getting ready to bike home. Aradia climbed on his handlebars and balanced impeccably, without using her arms at all. "Well?" she asked. "What are you waiting for?"

"You to grab the handlebars so you don't fall off."

"If it makes you feel better." She took hold of the handlebars exactly where his hands were. He smiled and pushed off, biking to his house.

When they arrived, Aradia hopped off and landed with perfect balance on her feet. "I've been dancing all day," she explained when he gave her a look of confusion.

"You'll be at the lake tomorrow?" Sollux asked.

"You bet!"

"See you," he said.

"See you," she responded, walking back to her own house. As she walked, he saw her do a handspring and a back limber. _I am so muscle-less_, he thought, turning to enter his house.

Karkat felt like a disaster at romance, yet again. He sat on a bench and watched as each of his friends walked out with their girlfriend or boyfriend. John and Vriska, holding hands. Aradia and Sollux, laughing as Sollux biked Aradia home. Tavros and Jade talking shyly. Rose and Kanaya walked out together, but they weren't holding hands or anything. No one really knew what was up with them. Eridan walked out with Feferi, as he stared at her and she laughed like she didn't even notice. Dave walked out alone, but rumor had it that he was going out with some girl from school. Even Equius, his arm around Nepeta as she smiled, giggled. He was just standing up to leave, feeling utterly hopeless, when he heard a voice form behind him. "You weren't thinking of abandoning me here, were you?" Terezi teased, sounding falsely shocked.

"Of course not," he teased back.

"I hate work," she said. "I feel like shit. Some do-it-yourself idiot got their phone wires all crossed and since Equius was fixing someone's clogged shower I had to go untangle them."

"I know," Karkat said. "Some guy at the _restau_ today didn't even speak French! He kept pointing at the steak on the menu and saying, '_Poulet, s'il te plait_,' at the same time! Damn fuckass! Doesn't even know how to say 'please' right. You don't use '_tu_' with some random waiter, everyone knows that."

"I'm so tired," she said, collapsing on the bench next to him. "I don't have the energy to walk to home together like we said we would."

"You know what," Karkat said, suddenly inspired. "Fuck that, let's go get cake."

Terezi laughed. She had such a nice laugh. "Come on," she said, taking his hand. "_Allons-y_!"

They walked to the _pâtisserie_, the pastry store. It must've been eleven or later. Karkat bought a cupcake, a marble one. Terezi bought a slice of red velvet cake. They sat in the empty café and ate their cake, laughing and enjoying every bite.

"Hey, can you do this?" Terezi asked, launching a piece of cake off her fork and right at his face. He dodged it.

"Oh, it's on," he said, launching a piece of his own cupcake back at her. It hit the chair as she ducked then crawled onto the floor. He suddenly felt frosting on the knee of his pants and he screeched and jumped on the table.

Terezi stood up and started laughing at him. "Wow, Karkat. That was so smooth."

He grinned and scraped some frosting onto his fingers. He bent down so that he and Terezi were face to face. "Very," he said as he smeared the frosting on her cheek and jumped down from the table. Terezi put on a face of mock shock. She picked up the plate with the remains of her red velvet cake on it and smashed it into Karkat's face. When she finally put it down on the table, he wiped the cream cheese frosting out of his eyes and shoved his cupcake on her nose and smeared it around her face. They continued to throw cake at each other and dash around the shop to avoid the oncoming pastry.

"Hey! You two!" the shopkeeper shouted at them, "You paid me to eat cake, not to throw it at each other and ruin my shop!"

"Correction!" Terezi yelled, "We paid you for the cake, not for what we would do with it!"

The fat shopkeeper's face tuned bright red and he picked up a broom. "Out! Out!" He screamed as he chased them with the broom. Laughing, Karkat grabbed Terezi's hand and ran with her out into the street. They ran until the _pâtisserie _was well out of sight. He then grabbed her other hand and they spun around a few times, before lying down side by side in the street.

"You know, Latula's probably wondering where I am," Terezi commented. It was well past midnight.

"Kankri probably is too."

"I doubt it."

"Yeah, you're probably right. I doubt Latula is, either."

Terezi smiled.

"Meulin might be. She's a bit more responsible."

"Responsible older siblings? What a shock."

"We all bond as siblings by insulting each other and burning poetry."

"What the hell?"

"We have fires where Nepeta and Meulin burn their own poetry. It's weird as fuck. Then we all insult each other. It's weird. Nepeta and Meulin are really sarcastic when they're family. Especially if you're a dude who doesn't know fucking sign language."

"You have a strange family."

"And you don't?"

"Guilty as charged."

They lied in the middle of the narrow, empty street and stared up at the stars.

"Karkat?" Terezi said, sounding a bit upset.

"Yeah?" he said, sleepy.

"I don't actually know what you look like."

"Is that bad?"

She half-smiled. "Not really. I was just wondering. And it's sort of a thing, knowing what you look like, since you're my boyfriend."

"I don't know how I can help."

"You could describe yourself to me."

"Uh…how do I do that?"

"Well, what color are your eyes?"

"I don't know."

"How do you not know what color your eyes are?"

"I just, I don't pay attention when I look in the mirror."

"You have a mirror?"

"Well, whenever I get dressed, I sort of just hope for the best." He sat for a minute before continuing. "I've never actually told anyone this before, but I just get five of the same pants and five different shirts and hope for the best when I'm getting ready for school."

"That's very practical," she said. "It's a good idea, really."

"When I have to get dressed up, I just sort of throw on a bunch of black and white clothes and hope. I mean, that's what you're supposed to do, right? You always do really well. You always look really pretty. I don't know how. I mean, I have eyeballs, I just choose not to use them."

"Obviously you do, if I'm pretty," she said coyly.

"Well, uh, you are really…pretty," Karkat said awkwardly, looking away from her, as if she could tell.

"Thanks," she said, smiling bashfully. A minute passed before she asked, "What color is your hair?"

"Sort of brownish, I guess. I dunno."

"Can I…oh, I don't know, like, grope your face or something?" she asked, sounding very awkward.

"Uh, sure," he said unsurely.

She sat up and turned to face him. He sat up, too, so he was eye-to-eye with her. She reached out a tentative hand and touched his cheek with the back of her hand. She felt his face with her hands, even his eyes. "You have a nice nose," she said.

"I don't know if that's a compliment or not," he said. "But thanks?"

She smiled. She pinched his cheeks, like Aradia's grandmother had when she volunteered at elementary school. Back when their grandparents were still alive. "Okay, now you're just messing around," he said, playfully brushing her hands away.

"No wonder you don't know what color your eyes are," Terezi said. "They smell sort of brown-blue-green-gray-red."

"Red?"

"Red."

They stared up at the sky again, lying side-by-side, holding hands tightly. But then Terezi sat up again.

"There's something else I've always wondered," she said. "What do _I_ look like?"

"Well," Karkat began. "You've got candy-red glasses. They're sort of pointed…"

"I mean my face," she said. "I know what my glasses look like. I just haven't seen myself in a mirror since I was eight."

"Uh…your hair is really red. Like, oh-fuck-my-head-is-on-fire red."

"So I've heard," she said jokingly.

"And your skin is sort of pale, like cream soda. The good kind from the _restau_. Your face is sort of oval-shaped and your chin is sort of round. Your nose is just a nice, normal nose. It's…like a button. It's kinda cute. Uh…do you mind if I take off your glasses?"

"No," she said.

He took off her glasses to see her eyes staring blankly, unseeingly, ahead. "Your eyes are teal, like blue and green all mixed up. They're really beautiful. And you have really big eyes and long eyelashes and your eyes kind of, like, sparkle," he continued shyly. "You're really beautiful."

"That can't be me," she said, sounding discouraged.

"What do you mean?" he asked. "Do you think I'm lying to you?"

"No. I'm just not that pretty," she said.

"Shut up, you're beautiful," he said, pulling her face closer to his and kissing her. He wrapped his arms around her waist as she laced her fingers together behind his neck. They stayed locked together for an eternity or two, but a perfect eternity.

When they broke apart, they flopped back onto the pavement. It must've been two or three in the morning. "I hate to say it, but we should probably go home."

"It's probably about two-thirty," she said. "Ready to get murdered?"

"When I am not ready to be murdered by my brother?" Karkat asked rhetorically. Terezi laughed. "Come on," she said. "Let's go home."

They lived in opposite directions. Karkat kissed her one more time before they split up to go to their homes.

Karkat took a steadying breath before he opened the door. Meulin and Kankri were standing in the living room, looking very angry. Meulin's arms were crossed and she had a firey look in her eyes. Kankri was standing and looking furious.

"Where the _hell_ were you?" Kankri shouted. He slapped Karkat. "What is wrong with you? Do you have all your limbs? Are you okay? Did someone hurt you?" He hugged Karkat so hard that Karkat though his bones would break as he stood there awkwardly, stiff as a board.

"You were supposed to be home three hours ago!" Meulin shouted, louder than normal.

"You'd think you two were my parents or some shit," Karkat muttered under his breath.

"Mom's not deaf!" Meulin shouted.

"Diana is not deaf!" Kankri shouted at the same time.

"What the fuck is wrong with my family?" Karkat asked thin air.

Nepeta jogged downstairs, rubbing her eyes. "What is going on?" she asked in exasperation. "Oh. You're home." She rolled her eyes and added, "You're insane. Didn't you know they would flip?" She pointed at her sister and his brother and climbed back upstairs.

"You are insane," Kankri said. "Latula told me that Terezi didn't say where you two were going!"

"Who says I was with Terezi?" Karkat challenged.

"Don't be stupid, of course you were. Just go to bed and next time you stay out until three in the morning, remind me to murder you!" Kankri shouted. "I will tell Dad."

"Yeah right! I'll just tell him about you and Latula."

"He already knows, ninety-nine percent probability."

"There's always that one percent. And what if I let it slip to Latula that you were cheating on her?"

"But I'm not! That would be ridiculous!"

"Of course not, fuckass! That would require two girls to find you attractive. But don't think I couldn't lie to get back at you."

"Hey, I said that when you came home from the field last time!"

"Yeah, no shit!"

"JUST GO TO BED AND DON'T SAY A WORD UNTIL MORNING!" Meulin shouted, sounding deeply exasperated.

Karkat walked upstairs to his room and slammed the door. He was exhausted, but somehow he just couldn't sleep. He danced around his room like a ten-year-old girl before lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling. He was too happy to sleep at all, for the entire night.

At maybe eleven, Nepeta walked in and leaned against the wall. "So. Nice date? Better be, because you woke me up in the middle of the night."

"Yeah," he said, almost dreamily. She rolled her eyes in an almost, "I told you so," way and crossed her arms.

"Well, Mom and Sigmund are coming home today, so be awake, because your brother is still pretty ticked," she said. "Just…try to act like you haven't stayed up all night. And like you're not so exhausted that I bet just about anything would make you start laughing hysterically."

"Yeah," he said again, still on cloud nine.

She half-smiled and walked out, leaving him to daydream.

Nepeta was lying on her bed, thinking, when the front door creaked open and her mom and stepdad walked in. "We're back!" her mom called.

"No shit!" Karkat yelled.

"Karkat!" Kankri yelled from his room. Nepeta rolled her eyes and signed, "I hate getting new family members."

"No kidding," Meulin agreed. "At least I can't hear them."

"I can," Nepeta signed. "And they're damn annoying."

"Poor hearing sister," Meulin signed. If she was talking, she'd be sounding smug and teasing, the tone only a sister can achieve.

"You could hear until the bomb that blew up your college," Nepeta reminded her sister.

"The bomb was in '42, when I still lived here," Meulin retorted.

"A bomb did hit your college," Nepeta pointed out.

"Not important," Meulin said. She smiled, remembering something. "Do the teachers still throw erasers here?"

"You bet," Nepeta signed. "It's illegal, but do they care?"

"Guess not," Meulin signed. "Could be worse. They used to hit kids when Mom was little."

"At least Mom's nice about that," Nepeta signed.

"Well, we haven't been bad kids," Meulin noted. "What about Sigmund and Kankri and Karkat?"

"I don't know," Nepeta shrugged. "Maybe?"

"I guess since Kankri goes to university, it doesn't matter to him."

"Since Mom's around, Sigmund probably wouldn't hit Karkat," Nepeta signed.

"Scary though, isn't it?"

"I'm glad our mom is so nice."

"Join the club," Meulin signed. Nepeta half-smiled and ambled back to her bed, where her favorite stuffed cat sat. It looked like the pet cat she'd had when she was little. They'd had to get rid of it during the war, because of rations and everything. She sighed and petted the stuffed cat, missing her life before the war.

Sollux sighed and rubbed his eyes. All this news on the radio about computers and all that new technology, it was so _cool_. He just needed a good degree in…math or something. Maybe live and work in Paris. He zoned out, daydreaming about a life in Paris with his friends and maybe Aradia.

"Sollux," Sollux's dad began, startling him out of the daydream. "I have to talk to you."

Sollux felt a sense of foreboding as he sat down at the round kitchen table across from his father. "What, _Papa_?"

"It's about Mituna," Sollux's dad began. "He's going to be staying here with us next week."

"But you're out of town on _jeudi et vendredi_, Thursday and Friday."

"Yes, I know. It's bad timing, but you'll have to take care of your brother those days."

"You've got to be kidding me."

"Sollux, he's your brother."

"I haven't seen him since Mom moved to Czechoslovakia!"

"He's still your brother."

"Do I have to?"

"Yes. Stop complaining. He arrives tomorrow."

"With _Maman_?"

Sollux's dad looked desperately sad when he replied, "No, on his own."

They were waiting at the train station in Nîmes when the train arrived and Mituna clambered off with his backpack. "SOLLUX!" he cried, giving his brother a shaky hug. Sollux stood as stiff as a board as his brother let go of him and hugged their dad. Mituna was as unhealthily thin as ever and (if it was possible) even more awkward since the last time they'd seen each other. Whatever had caused Mituna to lose his mind, it had affected his growth, so Mituna was weirdly out-of-proportion and a good bit shorter than Sollux and his dad.

"Come on, Mituna," Sollux said reluctantly. "Let's go."

Back at home, Mituna dropped his backpack on the couch and Sollux lugged it to his room.

"So…uh…what's Czechoslovakia like?" Sollux asked.

"Oh, it's great! There's trees and hills and castles and a school and—" Mituna suddenly cut himself off and laughed distortedly. His hard-to-understand lisp was especially prominent for some reason. "And in school I don't talk so I don't get in trouble and we speak French—" He stopped talking again. It was clear to Sollux that Mituna only went to school to fulfill requirements, and he didn't talk so no one kicked him out. It was a wonder he was still decently fluent in French.

It probably didn't matter all that much.

Whatever had caused Mituna to lose his mind like that, it had affected his health as way. Mituna was going to die before long, and the whole family knew it. No one knew how much time he had left, but it wasn't much. Sollux guessed that was why Mituna was visiting now, before…yeah.

"SOLLUX! Where are you going?" Mituna asked thickly the next morning as Sollux stuck a few francs in his pocket for lunch.

"Work," Sollux sighed heavily. "I've got a job at the hotel."

"WOW! That's so cool!" Mituna exclaimed.

Knowing that his brother's sentiments were genuine, Sollux sighed again and said, "Thanks."

"Can I come?"

Sollux squeezed his eyes shut and pursed his lips. He should've seen this coming. What could he say? His dad was already at work, and Mituna couldn't very well be left home alone. "Fine. But only today."

"YAY!" Mituna shouted. Sollux took a few more francs off the counter to buy lunch for his brother. Sollux sighed heavily. It wasn't that he hated his brother—far from it. It was more like…he was always responsible. For his own food, his own house, his own life. His dad was so busy that Sollux was in charge of just about everything but earning money. He wished that he could, just once, not be the responsible one.

"Sollux," Karkat began. "What. The. Actual. Fuck."

"This is my brother, Mituna," Sollux introduced resignedly. "He's going to be at work with me today."

"So he is just going to sit there in the office from hell while you work?"

"Yeah…"

"Are you fucking insane?"

"Just shut the fuck up. I can't just leave him at home."

"If you say so."

Sollux realized how insane he sounded and sighed yet again. "Come on, Mituna. I work up here." He resolutely climbed the stairs, opened the door to the Office From Hell, and started to work.

Mituna asked a question every few minutes. "What's that?"

"A calculator."

"What about lunch?"

"In a few minutes."

"Who was the guy in the black shirt?"

"My friend Karkat."

"You have lots of friends?"

"Yeah. I guess. Sort of."

"I have lots of friends!"

"Cool."

"What about the girl with long hair?"

"That's Aradia."

"Is…is she your girlfriend?"

Sollux breathed deeply through his nose, knowing that this would set off a fit. "Yeah."

Of course. Of course it set off another fucking fit of Mituna's. "But…but…but…Latula left when the bomb and exploding and she left so why do you I will cut you and take your girlfriend…"

"Calm down, Mituna," Sollux said. "You'll find someone else. Promise. Calm the fuck down before you break this place."

Mituna was almost completely incomprehensible for another few minutes before he sat quietly in the corner and said, "I'm sorry," very, very quietly.

_He always manages to make me feel guilty,_ Sollux thought. _I guess that's what brothers do. Why do I have to care about him?_ Why did he care about his brother so much?

He guessed that's what family was like.

But honestly, it wasn't really all that bad.

After all, that's what family was for.

His dad was home the next few days, and Sollux was working serious overtime, so he hardly saw his brother.

It was hard to pin down why he didn't enjoy his brother's company, but he also (in some weird, sibling way) loved Mituna. When he thought about, it was the responsibility. Always being in charge, always being the oldest, always being the one who had to keep everyone and everything together, always being _responsible_, it was wearing. Everyone thought it would be so cool to be the older sibling, but Sollux was utterly sick of it.

Why couldn't he be the little shit always getting in trouble and planning pranks and getting worse grades and being all creative and no one gave a shit?

But maybe…that was why he was logical and the way he was. He wouldn't be the same person if he hadn't been (sort of) the older one. Maybe it was part of him.

He'd had enough philosophy for the day. He had to prepare for two days alone with his brother.

"Hey, Sollux," Aradia said over the phone. "Help cooking for your brother?"

"Yeah," Sollux said. "Sorry. I wouldn't ask, but…"

"You can't cook toast," Aradia finished, sounding amused.

"Yeah."

"I'll be over tonight to make dinner and breakfast for tomorrow. Same goes for Friday."

"You are a damn lifesaver."

"You can kiss me later."

"I will."

"Nice to know. _A bientôt_, see you soon."

"_A bientôt_."

Sollux smiled in relief. It was true, he couldn't cook worth a flip. Aradia cooked for her whole family, so she could hopefully throw something together for Mituna and him. He loved her so much. She was wonderful.

"SOLLUX!" Mituna shouted. "Sollux! Can we get ice cream?"

"Sure," Sollux said. "Ice cream. What the hell?"

Ice cream was all over Mituna's face and shirt by the time it was all over. Sollux resolutely cleaned up his brother. He was never having kids. Never.

It was weird, but he felt guilty whenever he got frustrated with his brother. It wasn't Mituna's fault, whatever had happened. There wasn't anything anyone could've done, or could do. But he couldn't help getting annoyed when he was constantly forced to cook or clean or something he'd never been able to do.

Thank every higher power for Aradia.

Just then, someone knocked. Exactly four times. "Aradia," Sollux said, smiling as he opened the door. She always did that weird knock, four times precisely. She said it was important to some sci-fi character sometime. He said she was crazy. She said he was.

She kissed him and went straight to the kitchen. "When is the last time you went grocery shopping?" she called while he helped Mituna downstairs and flipped on the radio.

"Uh…last week?"

"You need milk, baguette, bread in general, cheese, milk, dairy, produce…I go shopping every day like a normal person. Sollux, I will be back in a half hour or so."

"Money's in the top drawer."

"I'll be quick and cheap."

"Thanks. I know, I know, I should go get fresh bread every day like a normal person, but…"

"Oh, don't worry."

"What would I do without you around?"

"Crash and burn."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence."

"Oh, you know I love you."

He smiled. "See you in a few."

"You're like a different person," Mituna observed. "She's magic!"

"Yeah," Sollux agreed absentmindedly. "Yeah. She's magic."

Aradia cooked _pot au feu_, beef stew with vegetables. "This should last you for a while. It keeps well and it's very hearty. It's for lunch. I'll get an omlette for dinner. You really need to learn this! I'll teach you sometime, _d'accord_, okay?"

"_Merci beaucoup_, thanks very much," Sollux said.

"_De rien_," she replied. "You're welcome."

They were supposed to go to the lake on Friday. However, Sollux had his own things to deal with. His dad was coming home the next day around nine AM, and Mituna was leaving round noon. But his brother had been begging to be taken around to all the stores for the whole week, and Sollux supposed that he might as well show his brother around before Mituna di—no, don't think about that.

"_Boulangerie_, bakery. You know, it's all the same as the last time you were here."

"It's pretty!"

"So here's the _chacuterie _and _boucherie_. You know they're the connected, like when we were little…before the war."

"It's so cool!" Mituna exclaimed, his lisp making him barely understandable. The _boucher_ smiled, remembering the little boy who had the accident and left. He gestured Sollux and his brother inside.

"Your friend was here just an hour ago," the man commented.

"Yeah," Sollux said, nodding. "She was cooking for us cuz my dad's out of town."

And of course that was when Mituna had a fit, all of a sudden. "THE BOMBS AND IT EXPLODED BECAUSE THEY WERE GOING TO DIE LATULA BETRAYED AND KURLOZ AND SHE WAS DEAF BECAUSE OF HIM AND HE STOPPED ME WHY IS IT HAPPENING AGAIN!?" Mituna screamed. Sollux grabbed his brother's arm and helped him back home.

He'd never admit it, not even to Aradia, but a tear ran down his face as he watched his brother writhe in helpless pain.

Mituna left on the train with their dad and Sollux went back home to have a lunch of that beef stew Aradia had made.

He had work on Monday.

He'd probably never see his brother alive again.

He put the thought out his mind and focused instead on how much work he still had to finish by the end of the week.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: I should probably note that I don't usually write this fast, I had this written out beforehand. Much thanks to my great friend slytherinpirate (tumblr) for the first part of the truth-or-dare scene.**

Chapter 6: Thing Which Are Really, Really Bad Ideas (But Really Fun)

They were all sprawled in the lobby at 3:00 PM, exhausted and overheated. And it was only July. Karkat was flopped on a couch and Sollux was leaning against a table. Kanaya and Rose were lying on the floor. Nepeta was sitting on a chair as far as possible from the window. Even Equius was sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall next to Nepeta's chair.

Mrs. Peixes, Candace, whatever her name was, entered the lobby, all happy and enthusiastic. "I need the paperwork for the Fishmans from six weeks a ago. Mrs. Fishman wished to file a complaint about one of the servers in the _restau_."

Karkat was too overheated and exhausted to do much but think, _Well, I'm fucked_. But Sollux had to stand up and walk to the office to find the month-old paperwork in the back of the filing cabinet. The sweat on his forehead made him look like he'd been swimming. His shirt stuck to him as he climbed the stairs to the office from hell and started to sort through the papers.

Aradia ran into the lobby just as Mrs. Peixes left. "I need someone to help me teach dance class," she said, out of breath from running.

Every hand shot up in the air. "I need a guy. It's the ballroom dancing class."

Terezi groaned and fell back onto the couch.

_Okay, I don't see Sollux_, Aradia thought. _Dave and John both have noodle arms, Karkat swears too much for a little kid's class, Eridan is really annoying and extremely creepy…well…there is the girl in the wheelchair…that leaves Equius_.

"Okay, you two," Aradia said, pointing at Tavros and Equius. "Come on."

Tavros wheeled out from behind the desk and followed her out the door. Equius stood slowly and also followed her to the dance studio.

"Tavros, I need you to work with a little girl who's in a wheelchair right now from polio. Equius, you're going to be my dance partner for the class. It's a bunch of five to sevens, you know, that ballroom dance class we all took as kids. Don't worry, it's easy and we're in the room with the fan," Aradia explained as they walked to the studio. Kids from the whole area came to the studio in Cabrières, the only one around.

She led her friends into studio 1 and flipped on the fan, turning off the light. "We try to keep the littlest kids cool. That's the bonus to teaching the youngest bracket," she explained, examining the music player and putting on the right record. "When the kids come, I'm going to introduce you guys as _Monsieur_ Tavros and _Monsieu_r Equius. I'm _Mademoiselle_ Aradia. It's how it works in dance. Just sort of sit there until I start teaching," Aradia continued. Tavros and Equius sat at the front of the room and looked awkward while Aradia opened the door to let in the kids in her class. "Come on in, sit in your spots! We have two new teachers helping us today. This is _Monsieur_ Equius and _Monsieur_ Tavros. Now, Marie, you'll be working with _Monsieur_ Tavros. The rest of you, usual partners please. We'll begin with the waltz we learned last week. Everybody ready? Great!"

"Aradia," Equius began, "I do not know how to waltz."

"You don't have to worry about breaking my wrist this time," Aradia said quietly, trying to start the record player. "It won't mess me up onstage. You don't have to worry about hurting me."

"No, I mean, I do not know how to ballroom dance," Equius insisted.

"Didn't you take the class when we were little?" Aradia asked.

"Yes," Equius answered. "But I forgot."

"Just let me lead," Aradia said. "I know what I'm doing. Pretend like you're leading."

"What?"

"Just follow me."

Aradia moved to the classic waltz, ONE-two-three, ONE-two-three. Equius stumbled along, trying to act like he knew what he was doing. "Sorry," he muttered as he stepped on her feet yet again.

"It's fine," she sighed, though she was sure that her feet would be black and blue by the next day.

After a few minutes of the song, Aradia said, "I'm going to come around and help you all," Aradia said, dropping Equius's hand. "Come on, you can learn a thing or two," she whispered to Equius.

"Down on the one, Pierre," she reminded a small boy dancing with a much taller girl.

"DOWN, up, up, DOWN, up, up," she said to Celeste, the little sister of Dave's ex-girlfriend, Collette.

"Put your hand on his shoulder," Aradia prompted a little girl who had no idea what she was doing named Giselle.

"Good job, class!" Aradia enthused when the record ended. "We're going to work on a more complicated version of the waltz today. Tavros and Marie, please stand with your crutches. _Merci_, thank you. Now, this is how it works…" Aradia put her hand on Equius's shoulder and started to count aloud while dancing. "ONE-two-three, ONE-two-three, ONE-two-three, DOWN-up-up, DOWN-up-up," she said, stepping in time to her counts. "Equius, can you try to not step on my toes?" she hissed.

"Sorry," he muttered, sweating profusely.

"You're hopeless," she said, half exasperated and half joking. "Just follow my lead."

"I am trying," he said.

Tavros was dancing with a seven-year-old girl called Marie and he had no idea what he was doing. "I'm going to be able to walk again in a month or two," she said. "Can you walk ever again?"

He smiled sadly. "No," he answered. "I haven't been able to walk since I was nine."

"How come you can't walk? I had polio," the little girl asked curiously.

"I got polio too," Tavros said. "Was it hard for you?"

"Yeah," she said, looking down. "It was really bad and it hurt a lot. But the nurses said I'm lucky because I survived and I'm gonna walk again. I didn't like it at all."

"Polio is hard," Tavros sympathized. "You're very lucky that you can walk some day. A lot of people who get polio can't even move their arms."

"The doctor said that it's good for me that I do dance," Marie said. "Because I get exercise for my legs."

"Really? Do you like dance?" Tavros asked.

"I love dancing," Marie said. "But I can't dance a lot until I can walk."

"I bet you're working hard to walk."

"Mm-hmm. But sometimes the nurses for physical therapy are really mean," she whispered.

"I'm sure they just want you to get better."

"I know. But I wish it wasn't so hard," Marie said.

"Alright, let's try this!" Aradia called from the front of the room. "You can all do this! You're all doing great. Ready? Alright, let's go!" She took Equius's left hand with her right and put her other hand on his shoulder. "If I'm not dancing, they don't know what to do," she whispered. "So please try to follow." Aradia started the song. "ONE-two-three, ONE-two-three," she counted off as the children tried to follow her steps. "You guys are doing great!" she called to the class, turning in a slow circle while she glared at Equius, the only other person in town besides Sollux who was taller than she was, trying to tell him without words everything she knew about dance.

The song ended and the kids promptly sat back down. "Great job, everyone!" Aradia enthused. "We're just going to work on this one until the end of class, okay?"

When the class ended, Equius practically ran back to the hotel.

Back at the hotel, when Sollux left his office from hell, he asked, "Why didn't you take me to the dance studio?"

"You weren't there."

"You could've found me."

She took his hands in hers and waved his arms around. "Noodle arms," she said in a ridiculous voice.

He laughed. "Gee, thanks," he joked. "You know Meenah's hosting a party tonight?"

"Yeah. My sister's going."

"You?"

"Are you?"

"Yeah…" Sollux admitted.

"Then I better be there, keep you out of trouble."

When it came time to go to the party, things quickly devolved until everyone gave up trying to keep anything under control.

Karkat wasn't completely sure who suggested that the group play truth or dare, and he wasn't completely sure why he went along with it. Honestly, he still couldn't believe that his brother was actually letting him come to this party, let alone drink the alcohol they served. But then he looked over to the corner where his brother was standing. Well, trying to stand. His friends had been getting him drunk for the past half hour, which Karkat had to admit was pretty funny. Karkat thought it over, or more accurately, pretended to think it over, because he was pretty damn drunk too.

Suddenly, everyone was sitting. Karkat's muddled thoughts rambled through his mind. _Am I sitting? Yeah, between Kankri and Sollux. Alright. Now, who's starting? It's Cronus._

_This should be interesting. _

"Feferi. Truth of Dare?" Cronus asked, lighting a cigarette.

"Hm…Truth!"

"What's the dirtiest thing you've done with Eridan?" The room giggled as Feferi blushed.

"Whale, um, I…heh heh…I gave him a lap dance once…"

Eridan blushed, remembering, as many of the rest of the group made catcalls.

"Latula, truth or dare?" Feferi asked.

"Dare!"

"I dare you to…take off your shirt for the rest of the game!"

Latula, who was highly intoxicated, smirked and slipped her shirt off, revealing a pretty teal bra, which Kankri stared at. She turned to Karkat.

"Truth or dare," She hiccupped. "Karkles?" He thought for a moment, then hesitantly responded.

"Dare."

"I dare you to…" She giggled. "Make out with your brother!" There was a general "oooo…" from the rest of the players. Karkat looked at Kankri, who looked slightly confused. He looked back at the crowd, which was looking at him expectantly. He looked back at his brother. He shyly leaned in and kissed him. To his surprise, Kankri grabbed him and kissed him back, passionately. Honestly, how drunk was he? Karkat got on top of Kankri and tangled his fingers in his brother's hair. He could sense people taking photos with those new Brownie cameras, but his drunk mind didn't care as he shoved his tongue in between Kankri's lips. Kankri, in turn, rubbed his tongue against Karkat's, eliciting a moan from the younger Vantas. He then moved on to kiss Karkat's neck and jaw, biting and sucking the soft skin.

That was the point where the other decided it was time to stop it before it went too far. Kanaya was elected to break it up, being one of the only sober ones in the group.

"Karkat." He wasn't listening. "Kankri." Same thing. She tapped Karkat's shoulder in an effort to distract him. "Karkat. That's enough." She grabbed his arm. "Karkat!" He looked at her. "That's your brother." He looked back at his intoxicated brother with an expression that seemed to say, "Oh…" By this time, the elder Vantas had promptly passed out. Karkat got off him and sat on the ground with his legs crossed awkwardly. He had a very prominent blush spreading across his cheeks. Kanaya's eyes were wide. Sollux's laughter could be heard throughout the room.

"KK seriously made out with his brother!" Sollux laughed.

Karkat glared at him. "Shut. Up." Everyone was laughing now. Great. On the list of embarrassing things he'd done, this was almost certainly on top. His dad was literally going to kill them both if he ever found out. But somehow, he didn't care. He was too drunk to care.

To cover his humiliation, Karkat turned to Sollux. "Sollux, truth or dare?" he asked through gritted teeth.

"Dare."

"I dare you to…play Seven Minutes in Heaven with Eridan."

Aradia, who was sober, turned to Feferi, who was giggling and drunk. "Does it bother you that your boyfriend is being locked in a closet with your ex?" she asked.

"Nope," Feferi giggled.

Aradia rolled her eyes and leaned back against the wall. This would be interesting.

Sollux and Eridan stumbled to the closet. Eridan was sober enough to register that he was going to be locked in a closet with a guy but drunk enough to not care. He heard the key turn in the locked and stared at Sollux. "So," he said.

"Dude, I'm drunk out of my mind," Sollux confessed.

"I'm not sure what to say here," Eridan said.

"Well."

"Well."

"So…"

"Yeah…"

And suddenly, they were kissing with a strange passion that sure wasn't there before. Eridan felt like Sollux was just mashing his lips into Eridan's, halfway between hunger and pain. They broke apart and sat at opposite ends of the closet, but then it was Eridan's turn to press his lips to Sollux's and force his tongue between Sollux's teeth. It was a hard, almost painful kiss that seemed to wind its way to the center of his drunk mind. Again, they broke apart and fell to opposite sides of the closet.

They sat, not touching, for maybe five minutes.

"You know, we've still got a minute or so," Eridan remarked.

"Yeah," Sollux said. There was a long pause. But then Eridan got on top of Sollux and kissed him again. Sollux didn't object at all. In fact, he kissed him back, even going so far as to run his fingers through Eridan's hair.

The door creaked open at just the wrong moment. Terezi and Karkat were standing there, arms linked. Karkat grabbed the camera from Terezi's hands and took a picture, saying to Sollux, "Payback, bitch."

Sollux walked back to the group in the most awkward manner possible. It was his turn. "Damara," he began. "Truth or dare?"

She said something in garbled Japanese.

"She said truth," Aradia translated automatically.

Damara was sitting with a lit cigarette in her hand. Rufioh had one arm around her and a beer bottle in his other hand.

"Uh…" Sollux was stumped. He sucked at this game. And he was drunk. "Who was your first fuck?"

Damara nearly dropped her cigarette. Her entire body tensed and her face showed a mix of shock and apprehension.

"It was me, wasn't it?" Rufioh said with a really dorky grin.

"Uh…" Damara said, looking uncomfortable. Across the circle, Cronus shifted awkwardly too.

Aradia saw the two. "What the fuck!" she screamed at her sister.

Everyone was dead shocked that Aradia swore. But then somebody else put together the pieces.

"You and _Cronus_?" Meulin asked incredulously. Damara sat perfectly still, like a porcelain doll. Cronus didn't say anything, either. But everyone was saying, "Oooo…" Rufioh looked distinctly confused. Damara scratched the back of her neck and laughed an awkward laugh. She turned to Kankri, who had woken up. "Truth or dare?" she asked in Japanese. At least, that's what Aradia translated.

"Truth," Kankri slurred.

Damara didn't even pause before saying, in plain old French, "I thought you were celibate?"

Kankri blushed a violent scarlet. "Well, when Mituna and Latula broke up, I was just sorta like, go for it, she's a pretty girl, and I liked her, so I sorta threw the celibacy thing out the window," he slurred. Latula threw her arm around him and giggled, giving him a very lovey-dovey look. Kankri faced Vriska. "Truth or dare?" he asked.

"Dare," she said cockily, sounding not too far gone. Her voice actually sounded almost normal, and her face was precisely the same as always. But her breath smelled like alcohol and something in her eyes looked blank and glassy, as if she wasn't entirely there anymore.

"I dare you to jump off the roof."

"Okay," Vriska said.

John was stunned. "Are you sure this is a good idea?" he asked Vriska. She was sober! What the _hell_ was she thinking?

"I'll be fine," she said, giving his a very messy kiss.

"Oh," he said. "You are drunk."

She climbed the stairs and somehow found her way onto the roof of Rose's house. John ran outside to the backyard to see Vriska poised to jump. "Shit," he said. There was no way he could hope to catch her from that height and even if he did, they'd probably both get hurt. What could he do?

Vriska looked left and right. By that time, just about everybody was out in the garden, watching Vriska. She looked down, and John could've sworn she laughed. She teetered on the edge for just a second, then jumped.

"Vriska!" John screamed in complete panic. But she landed on her feet and smiled. "I'm fine, John, see?" she said.

""What the _hell_?" he asked. He grabbed her shoulders. "What the hell were you thinking?"

"I knew I'd be fine," she said. John heard the slight difference in her voice that made her sound ever so slightly drunk, ever so slightly not all there.

"You scared the shit out of me!" he exclaimed. "Come on, let's go back inside."

"Okay," she agreed, following everyone back inside. John shook himself. He was so glad he was sober. John shook his head. He was so scared for her, scared that she would do something insane and actually get hurt. Something could happen to her at any moment, and even though he knew she could defend herself far better than he ever could, he still wanted to throw himself between her and anything that could hurt her.

While nearly everyone went outside, Kanaya and Rose stayed inside.

"Hi, Kanaya," Rose slurred.

"Please stop speaking. Your slurring is hurting my ears."

"I'm not slurring, I'm talking in cursive," Rose slurred, even worse than before. "It's quite elegant."

Kanaya dug her palms into her eye sockets. She had to do something so this mess wouldn't ever be discovered or exploited. She looked around at the cameras on the floor and contemplated her options.

Vriska sat back on the floor and spoke to Terezi. "Truth or dare?" she asked.

"Dare," Terezi shrugged. "I mean, what've I got to lose?"

"Your dignity. Your life. Everything," Karkat said.

"Somebody's a bit pissy," Kankri said, poking Karkat's shoulder.

Vriska didn't say anything. She just stood up and walked to the kitchen, leaving the entire room completely puzzled. But Terezi knew what was going on. "Dave. Lay down," she said.

"What," Dave said. "I thought this was Terezi's dare, not mine."

"Yeah, it is," Terezi said. "It is my dare. I hate her. I hate that bitch. Fuck her."

"I'm right here," Vriska said, an evil smile on her face and a jar of red jelly in her right hand.

"I know," Terezi said, without turning around. "I wanted you to hear."

"Won't this be lovely," Vriska taunted. Terezi turned to face her, and Karkat was fairly certain Terezi was glaring at Vriska, but it was hard to tell. They seemed to have a stare-down that lasted minutes, making everyone in the room wonder what had gone on between them in that past school year. Everyone knew that there was some serious bad blood between those two, but no one knew what.

"Dave," Vriska said. "Lie on your stomach and pull up your shirt. Just trust me on this one."

"I need a camera," Sollux laughed. He reached for one, but it wasn't there. "Hey!" he said.

"Someone hid all the cameras!" Cronus exclaimed. He found one behind the chair and checked the film. "It's been exposed to the light! Who was still here when Vriska jumped?"

Everyone turned to face Kanaya. She gave them a stern, motherly stare. "What happens here, stays here. Understand?" She looked each of them in the eye. Every one of them looked uncomfortable and nodded, looking slightly sheepish. Kanaya folded her arms and leaned back. "As you were," she said, sighing deeply.

Vriska poured some of the jelly onto the small of Dave's back. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" Dave asked, seeing very clearly where this was going.

"My just desserts," Vriska said, smiling mischievously at Terezi. Terezi smiled, but something in the way she moved suggested an apprehension she was unwilling to show to anyone.

"Wait…" Karkat said. "What is…wait…what?"

"You are really fucked up, scourge sister, you know that?" Terezi asked, her distaste finally showing in her voice.

"Yes I do," Vriska said, still smiling that self-satisfied smile.

Terezi winced and leaned over. Karkat suddenly lunged for her. Vriska grabbed him around the middle and held him back while he fought her and Terezi started licking the jelly. Karkat continued to fight Vriska, but she was far stronger than him.

"John?" Dave said.

"Yeah?"

"Can you kill me right now?"

"No, Dave, I can't."

"You are a terrible friend."

"Sorry."

Karkat was still fighting Vriska. Finally, he got in a lucky jab to her solar plexus and she involuntarily let go. As Vriska gasped for breath, Karkat lunged at Terezi and pulled her away from Dave, with no difficulty. Terezi was happy about it.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Vriska gasped, still trying to draw a breath. Karkat must've known that jabbing someone in the solar plexus, under her ribs, would cause them to loose their breath. Or maybe he was just lucky. It didn't matter. She exchanged death stares with Terezi. Terezi lifted her head briefly. Vriska copied the gesture. They still had an understanding of each other, despite all that had happened between them.

Karkat punched Dave in the nose. "What the FUCK?" Dave shouted instinctively. He pressed his palm to his nose. Blood leaked through his fingers.

"KK gave Dave a nosebleed," Sollux taunted.

"Shut. The. Fuck. Up," Karkat said, a dangerous tone creeping into her voice.

Dave shivered and contorted oddly, making a disgusted sound.

Terezi broke eye contact with Vriska first. She turned to Karkat and tried to say everything she was thinking with one look. She gave him a quick kiss and took a deep breath. She pulled her knees close to her chest and wrapped her arms around her knees. She rested her forehead on her left hand and her left elbow on her knee. "I have to go to the bathroom," she said.

"Are you gonna barf?" Latula asked.

"Possibly," Terezi said, her voice strained.

There was a loud retching from the bathroom. Without a word, Karkat stood and followed Terezi. He patted her back and said, "It's okay, you'll be fine." A few tears trickled down her face. "Sorry," she choked.

"Don't apologize," he said. "It's not your fault. It's the spiderbitch."

Back in the main room, Cronus said, "Well, I guess someone should take over her turn."

"I will," Meenah said. "Meulin—" she began, but no one had been looking at the clock and no one noticed that it was three AM.

"MEENAH! FEFERI!" Mrs. Peixes shouted. The entire room seemed frozen solid. Then, as if by some universal agreement, everyone scrambled out the windows and back to their respective homes.

Karkat woke up and took inventory. Head: pounding. Stomach: boiling. Mouth: disgusting and dry. Legs and arms: aching. Skin: sweaty. Heart: racing. Entire body: shaking badly. He felt so damn shitty, almost as if he'd caught the flu. He opened his eyes. At least his brother (he thought) and him and (as far as he could tell) no one extra had made it home.

Kankri walked up. "What happened?" he asked, disoriented. "Do I have all my clothes this time?"

"Hell if I know," Karkat responded. "And yes, you do. Luckily. I think I should ask Sollux."

"Dad's going to kill us," Kankri said.

"Shut the fuck up. My head is pounding and you're making it worse."

Kankri groaned. "Latula's coming over today. Maybe she can cover for us to our father."

"Why do you care?"

"I don't want you in trouble with our father."

"And why do you care if I'm in trouble with Dad?"

"You're my brother. I don't want Dad mad at you. It's common sense," Kankri shrugged.

The doorbell rang. Kankri groaned again and stood up. Karkat noticed his brother quickly fix his shirt and pants and pat his hair down. Karkat tried to sit up and follow suit, but it didn't work. He fell back on his bed and tried to come up with an excuse. He couldn't say homework, because it was summer. Maybe…he could say that he'd stayed up late doing some sort of service project? No, his father would know. Hm…Karkat thought. Then it hit him. It was obvious. He'd caught a cold. It would explain the exhaustion, the ill look on his face, the soreness in his limbs, the tremor in his hands. He just had to change into PJ's or something. How was it that he was fifteen and he was hung over? This was shaping up to be weirdest summer of his short life.

Just then, his father walked in. "What on Earth happened here?"

"I think I've got a cold," Karkat said, making his voice sound nasal.

"Where were you last night?"

"What do you mean? I don't know. I mean, Kankri and I were here, and I think I gave him my cold."

"I mean, where were you at eleven PM when I called and you weren't in your rooms? Either of you?"

"We all had to work late because a bunch of other people at the hotel left for summer. So we worked overtime."

"If you're sure," Karkat's dad relented. He left Karkat to flop on his bed and wrap himself in blankets. Kankri, walking back into the room briefly, said fervently, "That is the best story you have ever come up with."

Karkat was left alone with his thoughts. He tried to pull up his memories of the previous night. He could remember the start of the night, and up through the truth or dare game. He remembered Feferi's question, though not it answer (it was stupid gossip) and Latula's dare. And then he remember Latula saying, "I dare you to make out with—" But nothing else. He remembered himself on top of someone, kissing him or her, tongues touching, someone biting his jawbone and sucking on his neck (that explained _that_ bruise), but he couldn't pin down their name, or assign a face to the person, or even pull up an identity, like "girlfriend" or "best friend." He forced his memory forward, prying himself for details he didn't know for sure existed.

He got another detail. The person was not Terezi. He couldn't seem to recall that emotion he felt whenever he touched her, the emotion that nothing else gave him but she could pull up with ease. That was deeply bad. He pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes so that he saw strange colors and tried to remember. Any detail that might help him. He couldn't recall anything after a girl (Kanaya? Maybe) grabbed his arm and said something…that he couldn't quite remember. He closed his eyes tighter, dug his palms deeper into his eye sockets. Just then, the door opened, closed, opened, closed, opened, and closed one more time.

"What the fuck is going on?" he asked, standing up and walking downstairs. He pulled on a sweatshirt to cover the bruise on his neck. He stumbled on the threshold of his bedroom door. He still wasn't used to this new house.

"Mom and Sigmund left, and Terezi came," Nepeta answered. "She's got a picture for you."

"Shit," Karkat swore, rubbing his eyes and trying to pat down his hair. Nepeta rolled her eyes and poured a glass of lemonade.

"By the way, Kanaya's looking for you. There's something she was going to tell you so your dad doesn't find out about last night. Why you didn't just stay home is beyond me…" Nepeta added, shaking her head. Of course _she _hadn't gotten drunk or done anythign dumb she couldn't remember. She climbed the stairs to her room, leaving the four of them, hung over, in the kitchen.

Kankri was sitting at the table with his head in his hands while Latula (who looked, if a bit tired, perfectly fine) patted his back and smiled in a sort of my-boyfriend-did-something-dumb-but-I-love-him-so- it's-cute way. Terezi, who looked a bit sick but at least in better shape than he was, was sitting with a glass of water and a photo from a Brownie camera, the only kind anyone had. She gave him a thin-lipped smile and held out the photo for him to see. Karkat took one look and fainted.

"Karkles. Are you okay?" Terezi asked, seeing Karkat collapse on the floor in a dead faint.

"He'll be fine," Kankri said. "He does that."

"When?" Latula asked, surprised.

"First day of _lycée_, high school. The day Mom died. When Terezi found out he liked her. Couple other times, too. It's a family trait," Kankri listed. "Ugh, my head."

"Yeah, that's what happens when you let your friends get you wasted. I guess it's different at university. Don't worry, you'll feel better soon," Latula consoled. "And your brother covered for you pretty well."

"Karkles," Terezi repeated, patting his face. His head lolled to the side. He blinked, groaned. "Fuck," he said. "Fuck, fuck, fuck."

"Pretty much," Kankri agreed.

The picture, which Terezi had taken the previous night when the two brothers had been kissing passionately, lied on the table like it paid rent or something. "May I?" Karkat asked. Terezi nodded. He grabbed the picture, tore it into two pieces, then four, then eight, then sixteen, then even more. He had the realization that this was probably why Meulin and Nepeta burned their poetry. He walked into the living room, threw the piece into the fire, and called, "So, who wants to have a fire?"

"Sure," Terezi agreed, walking into the room. Karkat piled some logs and twigs and a bit more paper into the fireplace and lit it. There was a certain satisfaction in watching the incriminating picture go up in smoke. "Please tell me other people don't have pictures."

"Don't be ridiculous," Terezi said. "Of course they do. Kanaya got nearly everyone to give them to her and then she ripped them and shit. She's so protective and motherly."

"Nearly everyone?"

"Take a guess."

"_Ampora_. I hate my life."

"Join the club."

"But you look fine!"

"The miracles of makeup."

"Wait, you have makeup?"

"Latula put some on so our mom wouldn't know. Mom's cool and all, but she would kill us."

"You are so damn lucky. I told my dad that Kankri and I worked late and that we caught colds. I don't think he believes me."

"Why wouldn't he? You lie very well."

"Yeah, but my dad never believes anything I say."

"Why not?"

"He doesn't trust me."

"And why not?"

"I sure as hell don't know! Can we all please shut up and sit in peace and fucking quiet so my head stops pounding like a fucking porcupine is beating on the inside of my skull with a hammer while managing to stab my brain with all those fucking useless quills all over its tiny wriggling pink body? Thank you!"

"Calm down," Terezi said. "Your dad believes you, you'll feel better tomorrow, this whole thing will blow over within a week when Eridan or someone does something even more ridiculous and humiliating—"

"Gee, thanks for making me feel so much fucking better about that."

"—And I'm sure not mad at you. So calm down and sit here. We can listen to radio or something."

"We have a television, you know."

"Really?"

"No, I'm kidding. We'd never get a TV. I mean, they're really damn expensive. I bet they'll still be like this in twenty years. And phones will still make that fucking loud noise and they'll still be moronically oversized and annoying to use. Why can't scientists come up with some sort of fucking magical miniaturization technology to make little machines to do math and shit for us so we can watch these damn programs in color and have machines to play music and write essays and do math and shit?"

"Sit. Calm. You need to calm down, or you'll break something," Terezi said, patting the spot on the couch next to her. "You're not making sense."

"You're right. I'm not," Karkat said, discouraged. "I need sleep."

"Maybe…look. Why don't we just listen to some radio and relax?"

"Yeah. That sounds good." It had been a long week.

Maybe it was time to relax a bit.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Petit chou (literally meaning little cabbage) is a French term of endearment. **

Chapter 6: In Which Dead Relatives Come Back to Life.

"Aradia!" Damara shouted.

"I'm busy!" Aradia called back, kicking her legs up into a handstand.

"Aradia, come here!" Damara repeated.

"What?" Aradia asked, starting to fight for her handstand, as happened after the first minute or so.

"It's Aunt Leanne! She's alive!"

"OUCH!" Aradia shouted as her arms gave way and she collapsed on the ground, head first. Aunt Leanne? It couldn't be true. But Damara sounded normal, in her right mind. Aradia slowly stood, gathering her courage, and walked to the living room nervously.

Aunt Leanne sat on the couch, exhausted and pale.

"Hi there, _ma petite chou_," Aunt Leanne said.

"Aunt Leanne? Is that really you?" Aradia asked in disbelief. It couldn't be her aunt. But there she was, her mother's sister, sitting on the couch like every day back in Paris before the war.

"It's really me," her aunt said with a wobbly smile.

"What happened?" Aradia asked, still stunned.

"I think you should know the whole story," Aunt Leanne said. "So I'll start from the very beginning.

"In 1940, when the Nazis came and took your father and I, they found out that your father was married and had two children. They found your mother, by tracking you to this tiny town, and they told her that they knew she was Jewish, that they had her husband and her sister (me), and that they could easily kill all of us, including you two, unless she helped them. So she did. During the war, all those times she disappeared for days, she was working for them to keep all of us alive. She hated it.

"I know your mother's not quite in her right mind. That's because, when the war ended, they killed your father anyways. They told your mother that to torture her, because they knew that if she stayed sane, she would tell the Allies everything. She felt that she'd betrayed everything for nothing. She still searched for your father and I, even after the war ended. I was making my way here, where I was sure you would go, when I found your mother and came back here.

"Damara knew all this, which is one of the reasons she's also not in her right mind quite often. But neither of them told you because they knew you wouldn't be able to take it, especially at such a young age (by which I mean seven)."

"How did you survive, _Tante_ Leanne?" Aradia asked, curious.

"They tried to shoot me in front of a pit in 1945, when the Allies were coming. Right before they shot at me, I jumped backwards to make it look like I'd been shot. That night, I climbed out of the pit and started walking. I stayed in Paris for a year or so, recovering and trying to find you. Then I remembered that you, _petit chou_, spoke German and that we had planned to go south if we were ever found. So I knew you hadn't died, and I knew that you would go south. So I started to go south, too, to find you. But there are so many towns and cities, as you well know. It was pure luck that I found your mother at all."

Aradia started crying. "I thought you were dead," she said. "And _Maman_ really…?"

Aunt Leanne nodded. "I'm sorry," she said. "I'm so sorry."

Aradia couldn't stop crying. Her aunt hugged Aradia like she was five years old again. "It's okay, _petite chou_. It's okay to cry."

When Aradia caught her breath again and was sitting, her aunt took a deep breath and said, "What have you been up to in these past eight years?"

"Well," Aradia said. "I teach at a dance studio five days a week, eight hours a day. I made a lot of friends here in Cabrières. And there's a lake that we all go to most days. And I have a boyfriend. His name is Sollux and he looks like he grew a foot overnight, but he's nice and funny and sweet. And my friend Tavros moved here from Spain and he couldn't speak much French so I was the only one he could talk to for a long time and my friend Nepeta is really short and skinny and a hopeless romantic and my friend Kanaya is very maternal and fashionable and my friend…oh, I'm doing a terrible job of explaining this."

"No, it's fine," Aunt Leanne said. "I'd like to meet your friends."

Aunt Leanne was twelve years younger than Aradia's mother, who was 42. She was extremely tall, like Aradia, with dark brown hair like Damara and big eyes like Hannah, Aradia's mom. She was always smiling and joking, never serious. But the years between 1940 and 1945, in which Aradia assumed her Aunt had been in a concentration camp, her aunt had become thin and pale, until even two years later, her cheekbones were sharper than before and her wrists were as boney as a skeleton. It scared Aradia to see her aunt looking sick, even though she knew that the Nazis were long since gone.

The doorbell rang. "That's probably Sollux," Aradia said, jumping up and running for the door that close friends and family used, which was in the kitchen.

"Hey, AA," Sollux said, kissing her. "Are you coming to the lake?"

"About that," Aradia began. "Do you remember me talking about my Aunt Leanne?"

"Yes…" he said. "Didn't she die?"

"Apparently not," Aradia said, leading him into the living room, where Aunt Leanne sat on the threadbare couch.

"Hello," Aunt Leanne said. "You must be Sollux. Nice to meet you."

"_Enchantée_," Sollux replied. "Nice to meet you." But he looked stunned.

"So, um, I don't know if I can come to the lake today," Aradia said awkwardly.

"Okay. It's just, we were going to have that picnic in the field today," Sollux said, sounding hopeful.

Aradia looked from her aunt to her boyfriend, torn. She so wanted to go to the picnic with Sollux, but she also wanted to spend time with her aunt who had been missing for seven years.

"Oh, go to the lake, _ma petite chou_. You'll have plenty of time to talk to your old aunt later. Anyways, I want to have a talk with your mother and sister," Aunt Leanne said.

"Thanks, Aunt Leanne. _A bientôt_," Aradia said, taking Sollux's hand and leaving through the kitchen door.

"So…" Sollux said as they walked down the road, looking at Aradia.

"Well, she was held for ransom sort of so my mom would work for the Nazis," Aradia stated. "My mom betrayed us to save my aunt's life and my life and Damara's life and my dad's life but they killed my dad anyways and…" Aradia started crying again. "My mom betrayed the whole damn country to save our lives. I didn't know…" She started sobbing on his shoulder. Sollux patted her back awkwardly. They were walking by the side of the road. What was he supposed to do?

Karkat was passing with Terezi. Sollux mouthed, "Help me." He had no clue what to do. Karkat flipped him off with a smile that said, "I have enough trouble with my own girlfriend. You're on your own."

"It's okay, Aradia," Sollux said. "You'd be dead if your mom hadn't done that. I mean, you matter. And you mom must've really loved you and your sister and her sister and your dad. I love you and I'm glad you're alive."

"It's just too much," she said. "I can't believe she's alive. I can't believe my mom betrayed the country. I can't believe my whole family would be dead if she didn't. I can't believe Damara knew. I can't believe any of this. I just…" The sobs stopped her. Emotions were all scrambled inside her like the rapids of a river. Even thinking about the field, the never-ending field where no one except those she knew and loved could find, couldn't calm her.

Somehow, she kept walking. She kept moving towards the lake, the place of safety. The place where nothing could hurt her, where people wouldn't betray for her life, where she could sit with Sollux and figure this out, where there weren't dead aunts come back to life and sisters didn't lie to her and mothers didn't kill people to protect her.

When they finally arrived at the lake, everyone had already gone to the field. Aradia collapsed on the beach as her legs gave way under all the pressure of everything that had happened that day. "What's wrong with me?" she asked rhetorically.

"Nothing," Sollux answered. "I'd be crying, too. I think anybody would. I mean, it's sort of a lot to take in. You're perfectly fine."

Aradia pulled her legs close to her chest and buried her face in her knees. "I must've done something wrong. I'm the only sane one in my family. If I'd hidden us a bit better, or made my mom say stuff in German, or gone somewhere else, we'd be fine and my mom would be fine and Damara would too and maybe Dad would be alive—"

"There was nothing you could've done. This is the best it could be. And come on, your aunt's back. That's good, right? Is that good?" He suddenly doubted himself. What if her aunt was like her mom?

"Yes, it's great," she said, but it didn't sound great. "It's just…if my mom hadn't lied and betrayed, she'd be dead. I should be dead. We should all be dead, all five of us. We should be dead."

"But where would we be? Where would I be without you?" Sollux asked her. "Think about your friends. If you'd never come here seven years ago, Tavros would never have met us. Or Vriska. And all of us who'd lived here since we were little, we were so glad to see someone new. And if I'd never met you…everything would be different. You changed everything for the better around here. And think about it: if they'd said to your mom, 'Help us or we'll kill you,' she probably would've said, 'Fine, shoot me.' But because they said they'd kill _you_, she had to help them. She was willing to give up everything for you."

Aradia still didn't stop crying.

"Remember my grandpa? How he couldn't walk? They killed him, and for a long time, I thought it was my fault. Like, I should've done this or that or the other thing to save him. But I guess I always knew there was nothing. It wasn't my fault. It was theirs. They took my grandpa and killed him, but it wasn't because of anything I ever did. It's sorta the same. There was nothing you could've done."

She was curled up against his side and his arm was around her. She wasn't crying as hard now. He still didn't know what to do.

"Did I say something wrong? Did I do something?" he asked her.

"No, it's not you. It's everything else. Thanks for being here," she said.

He patted her back awkwardly. "It's alright, AA," he said, trying to sound lighthearted. But tears welled up in his eyes, too.

"Are you okay?" Sollux asked Aradia when her sobs had subsided to hiccups.

"Yeah," she said. "Okay, no. But I think I can go to the picnic now." She splashed some lake water onto her face and rubbed her eyes viciously.

"Well, uh, shall we go?" Sollux asked. She nodded, facing the water. "Let's go," she agreed.

Sollux took her hand and walked with her to the field. "AA? Are you sure you want to go?" he asked, seeing the redness on her face.

"No," she said. "I'm not sure. But I'm going anyways."

Aradia knew that she couldn't let this control her. Her mom had betrayed the country to save her life, and maybe she shouldn't have done that, but it was too late to change anything. But it was so hard to know that she was only alive because others were dead. The only reason that she was sitting next to the boy she loved, in her place of safety, with her aunt at home talking to her mother and sister, was treason. She felt unsteady on her feet as she walked to the field. But when it was all was said and done, it was in the past.

All she could do was live with it.

Aradia walked home alone, saying that she needed time to think. This left Sollux to walk home with Karkat.

"So, who was it who set up that huge romantic gesture with Terezi for you?"

"My stepsisters."

"Both of them?"

"Meulin packed a fucking picnic. Nepeta helped me set it up and bought some fucking flowers. And a poem. Yeah."

"You asked a girl who used to have a crush on you to help you win back your girlfriend?"

"What the fuck?!"

"Yeah, didn't you know?" Sollux asked. "She liked you for years and years."

"Wait, what!?" Karkat asked, stunned.

"I thought you knew," Sollux shrugged. "Nepeta had a crush on you from, uh, fifth grade to eighth grade, I think."

"Why didn't you tell me?" Karkat nearly yelled.

"It didn't seem that important, since you never liked her," Sollux said, utterly nonplussed.

"She's my fucking stepsister, numbnuts! I think that this is sort of thing you fucking tell someone when they randomly gain a fucking stepsister, especially one who gives you fucking advice in the hell that is romance!"

"Calm. The. Fuck. Down," Sollux said. "I didn't even know until seventh grade. Maybe eighth. Aradia told me, and no one else knew."

"Why does _no one_ ever fucking tell me these things?"

"Seriously. Chill the fuck out. She doesn't like you anymore. Hell, she gave up on you in sixth grade," Sollux informed him.

"Should I…hell, I don't know…say something?"

"Uh…"

"Why do we both fucking suck at romance?"

"I sure as fuck don't know, but it's true."

"Maybe I can just say, 'Hey, stepsister, so you used to have a crush on me,'" Karkat speculated.

"You could let it lie," Sollux suggested. "You know, let sleeping dogs lie and all that shit."

"That feels awkward to me."

"More awkward than just going up to your stepsister who is giving you romance advice and saying, 'Hey, you liked me for four damn years'?" Sollux asked.

"I'll fucking come up with something better, fuckass."

"Yeah. Right."

Karkat walked home the rest of the way alone.

Nepeta was sitting on her bed, as usual, writing poetry and checking her notebook for references to her old crush, her old embarrassing poems. She heard someone walk in and looked up. Karkat was standing there. Something told her that he wasn't looking for advice about Terezi.

"Oh…" she said, when he opened his mouth.

"What?" he asked in surprise.

"You found out," she stated.

"Uh…found out what?" he asked, unsure whether or not they were talking about the same thing.

"You know. Four damn years," she sighed, shaking her head and covering her face with her hands. "You might as well read all that damned poetry then." She tossed the notebook on the bed next to her as if she wanted it away from her forever.

"Wait…what?" he asked again.

"Do you have any idea how many poems I wrote for you?" she asked, rolling her eyes. "Four years was plenty of time to perfect the art of writing poetry. Jeez, boys can be so stupid sometimes."

"Gee, thanks," he said sarcastically. "There was no fucking way I could've known!"

"I thought you would've figured it out when I wouldn't let you read my poetry. Or, adding to that, when you knew I was good at writing poetry and you needed help and I refused to let you read the poems. Because I helped you with other stuff. Whatever. It doesn't matter now," she said, picking up her book again, trying to hint that she wanted to be alone.

"But…What the hell…" he tried to say, stumbling on his words.

"Look. Here it is in plain old French. I had a crush on you for three or four years in fifth to eighth grades. I wrote a lot of poems for you. I gave up on you in sixth grade because it was obvious you didn't like me. Then I started going out with Equius and now I don't have a crush on you anymore."

"And why didn't you tell me?" Karkat asked.

"I couldn't," she said simply. "I couldn't tell you. I was too shy and too scared and I knew you didn't like me back. Now, please, leave me alone." Something in her voice told him that her secret, the one thing she really wanted to bury, had been unearthed. Something she never intended him to find out had been discovered and thrown into the light. She sounded almost broken.

"I'll go," he said, seeing her expression of upset and exhaustion.

She nodded, looking deeply unhappy.

When he left the room, Nepeta felt a tear or two trickle down her cheek. She'd hoped that that no one would ever find out about that. In addition to being embarrassing as hell, it was her secret. It was the part of herself that she kept well hidden. It ached her to know that her secret was out. It probably seemed silly, ridiculous even, but she'd hoped to keep it a secret. She only told Equius at the very end of _collège_, middle school, but that was because she knew what he would say. Whatever. It wasn't like it mattered all that much anymore.

Since the war, a lot of things seemed like they didn't matter anymore.


End file.
